happy labor day!

This post isn't really about Labor Day, but I'm wishing those who celebrate today a nice one!

I don't think I've mentioned it, but the day after we found out that our offer had been accepted, Stéphane's computer died. Well of course it did, right? So the last couple of weeks we've been sharing mine, and if you know my husband at all, that means he completely takes it over when he's home. The new one should be ready on Wednesday, hurray!

Not that I don't have plenty to keep my occupied. I've discovered that I can, at long last, enjoy reading a book without craving a cigarette for the first time since I quit two and a half years ago. What a relief! I really missed reading.

Meanwhile, we signed the contract for the apartment last week and we have an appointment at the bank on May 12, then it's pretty much sit and wait for the notaries to do their stuff. We're told to expect at least two months but no more than three months for the paperwork to go through. Obviously we're hoping for closer to two so we can do a little work in there before we move in, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. I refuse to stress over it!

What does threaten to stress me out is our current landlord. We had to call her for some documents she completely flipped out, saying she wanted to start showing the apartment as soon as possible. Last night she stopped by with a sign to hang out in front of the apartment and we haven't even given our three month notice yet! Fortunately, there are actual laws in place for showing an apartment when there is someone still living in it: the landlord is not allowed to show it when we're not here and we can set limits. We're thinking that she must give us 24 hours notice and nothing after 7pm so as not to disrupt Fry's evening schedule. The thing I don't understand is that she owns outright at least six apartments that I know of, so I can't imagine what her financial outlook must be if she's dependent on incoming rent from every single one every month!

So that's a taste of what's happening around these parts!

homemade laundry detergent

I mentioned on twitter yesterday that I'd just finished whipping up a batch of homemade laundry detergent and a bunch of people showed interest in my recipe, so I thought I'd post it here.

Making my own laundry detergent seems so random, but it was a natural progression, in fact! We decided to use cloth diapers before Fry was even born, but you can't use regular laundry detergent with them, because the chemicals eventually break down the absorbing properties of the diapers. You can buy special chemical-free detergent at most health food stores, but they are really expensive, nearly negating the savings we were making with the cloth diapers themselves! Around the same time, I started using soap nuts for cleaning our clothes. While I really appreciated that our clothes no longer smelled like chemicals and they were indeed clean, soap nuts don't have natural bleaching properties and our clothes started to look dingy. Plus, they didn't do anything against the extremely hard water we have here.

In looking around for alternatives, I found loads of recipes for homemade detergents that are suitable for cloth diapers and for clothes. Unfortunately, if you live outside North America, you will have to have a hook-up for the Borax. If anyone knows of a source for Borax in Europe or a good substitute, please let me know! My sister brought me a box when she visited last summer, and I brought back a box as well after our visit, and we've been using it ever since. I haven't even opened the second box yet, though I think I will have to for the next batch. I based my recipe off of this one, and here is my current recipe:

Homemade Laundry Detergent



You will need:
1 bar laundry soap*
1 cup Borax
1 cup washing soda**
1/2 cup oxygen cleaning powder

*I use savon de Marseille, which has a lovely subtle scent that I quite like, but you can get unscented and even add a bit of essential oil if you like.
**Washing soda is called cristaux de soude in French

First, I mix together the Borax, washing soda and oxygen powder, since they are all powdered anyway. Then I start to grate the laundry soap and folding it into the powder as I go. I find it mixes together better than grating all the soap at once and trying to mix it together at the end.

You only need a heaping tablespoon for a load of laundry and one batch should last several months! I find this works really well, and even Fry's clothes that has suffered from... accidents (ahem) come out perfectly clean and stain-free. As you can see from the photo, I keep mine in a very large jar with the recipe taped on so it's always handy.

I hope this helps those of you that have asked; please do let me know if you try it!

OH one more thing! This is not the same recipe to use for cloth diapers! There is some concern that the laundry soap can cause build up, which can be bad for the diapers. I used the recipe that I linked above, which is equal parts Borax, washing soda and oxygen cleaning powder, and they still look brand new! We aren't using them right now (kind of a long story), but we are hanging on to them to use with the next little person that comes along.

in which Vivi forgets to blog

There is SO MUCH going on right now and I've lost the instinct to run to my computer whenever something interesting happens, so I'm playing a bit of catch up.

First, and most important really: our offer on the apartment has been accepted!! There was a tense moment when we weren't sure they would accept it, but they did and it has been such a huge weight off our shoulders! Even better, we've already had the inspection done and we are not required to have any work done to qualify for our interest free loan! Even if everything meets code (though just barely, surely, considering some of the electrical wiring we've seen!), we are going to bring an electrician in to update a few key places, especially the room where the computers will go, and we may even redo the kitchen (YAY!!). But, before we can do all that, we have to sign the contract this week and get the bank stuff going, and then we have to wait about two months for the paperwork to go through. Meanwhile, this apartment needs to be in viewing shape for potential new renters! YIKES!!

This past weekend was the Katia & Kyliemac Episode 333 extravaganza party in Paris. I had been planning for months to go and even bought my train tickets over a month in advance. Of course, the damned SNCF decided that last weekend would be a lovely time to go on strike, so I found out Saturday morning that my train had been canceled. No problem, I wasn't missing this party, so I decided to DRIVE into Paris, much to the chagrin of Stéphane. Making things even trickier, last weekend was also the first weekend of Spring Break for the Paris region, and with the planes grounded from volcanic ash and trains stopped from the strike, the roads were slam-packed with cars! I did manage to make it in just over three hours (normal driving time should be about two and a half or one and a half if taking the toll roads) and I had an amazing time! I met loads of new people, was very happy to catch up with some dear friends I haven't seen in ages, and I drank an obscene amount of cider. Seriously, I haven't partied like that in literally years and am only just now getting over the hangover!

Home again home again and Stéphane's Spring Break has just ended. We had a nice, calm couple of weeks, slightly stressful with the apartment business but lots of visits to Mémère's house and visits with friends and family. Fry continues to impress and delight us everyday and I'm feeling much calmer and happier, now that I see a real path forming before us. Keeping in mind the famous saying "Man plans, God laughs," I am hopeful that the coming months and years will see us happily moved into our new apartment, hopefully a brother or sister for Fry, and me finally putting my money where my mouth is and starting a business in Tiny Town. I can't wait to see what the future has in store for us!

in which we can't make up our minds

So, yesterday we visited an apartment for sale. The building itself is about 50 years old and most of the occupants are owners, so that's a good thing. I don't think either one of us are super enthused about moving into an apartment complex, especially Stéphane, who grew up in a huge apartment block and swore he'd never move back. This is hardly apartment block sized, but the idea of having neighbors above us and below us, especially with a little one that likes to do the flamenco, we are a bit hesitant.

I'm hoping if I type this out a little it will make things clearer:

The price is certainly interesting, and we would be able use less of our savings as a down payment (and keeping a little aside for starting a business, perhaps?). However, we'd forgotten about the charges for the upkeep of the apartment complex, all the grass, and the shared gas payments, so we wouldn't save *as much* per month as we hoped.

Even though it's only slightly bigger than our current home, it is much better organized. The bathroom is tiny but has a real bathtub (Fry has been taking his baths in a plastic tub, thanks to our tiny shower stall). The kitchen is small, but we can possibly invest in a better kitchen set up (maybe a built in counter with a stove, etc) and make better use of that space, plus the door can keep little people out when the oven's on. To make up for the tiny bathroom, there's a "cellier" next to the kitchen, where we think we could put the dishwasher, washing machine and clothes dryer, plus with some shelving we could have a small pantry. There is more closet space than we've got here, without a doubt, plus a private storage space in the basement, where we could easily store stuff we don't need, plus maybe a bike or two, and there's a space to put the stroller, which will open up a lot of space that we can't have here.

The former (current?) owners have closed off part of the salon and made a third tiny bedroom, which suits us fine, as that would be our office/guest room. Obviously, there's no private garden, but there's a huge space behind the apartment complex, but I certainly didn't see anyone hanging out on the grass, so that would be a drag to have all that space and not be able to play on it. There's also the fact that some of the electricity needs to be redone, so for us that means we'd want to ask a smaller price.

So there we are. Right now we are leaning towards making an offer, but setting a strict limit and not going one euro above it. We told the agent that we'd have an answer to him by Tuesday one way or another, so we've got a couple of days to make our decision.

Other than that, we're enjoying Stéphane's spring break. We had a nice evening out with his colleagues while Fry spent the night at Mémère's house (we'll definitely be doing that again soon, ah FREEDOM!!), we've done a little local sightseeing, we're going to visit family this afternoon and we're hoping to hook up with some friends next week. My allergies are starting to bother me and Fry's got some weird bacterial infection but otherwise we're doing really well.

and then nothing happened at all

Oh, this week was hard. Last week, my first week home alone with Fry in three months, was lovely. We played, we walked around Tiny Town, we watched our favorite episodes of Sesame Street Old School, it was fun! I guess the novelty of having Mommy home wore off though, because this week was all about ignoring Mommy and doing all the little things that drive me crazy: playing with the mouse and the keyboard of my computer, bouncing on the couch (when a very hard concrete floor awaits below), pulling the curtains, throwing everything on the floor. Good times, y'all, good times.

So this week has been all about trying to find ways to occupy Fry's awake time with not much success. I started knitting again this week, too. I'm determined to work down some of my stash before I buy more, so that means there will be some blankets in my future. Which is fine, we can always use some more throws around the house. Plus maybe I can finally finish the sweater I started for Stéphane two years ago. Heh.

Speaking of Stéphane, his spring break starts tomorrow. I'm hoping we can get out a little over the next couple of weeks, if the weather warms up a little (Mother Nature is having a mid-life crisis here as well, as we had a couple of days of lovely weather, followed by nearly freezing temps at night this week). And on Monday evening we are going to a party. A *grown up* party. And Fry will be spending the night at his grandmother's house. We are also supposed to try to explore some solutions for our housing situation as well. We shall see how that goes.

Wishing you all a very happy Easter weekend!

and then everything happened at once

This past week has been a complete roller coaster, and I regret that I didn't think to document it here as it was happening, because now it's all so anti-climatic. In any case, here's a run down:

First we decided to take the leap on house #2, which was really at the limit of our budget, but before we signed anything, we had the house inspected. Because we qualify for a government loan with zero interest, we had to be sure that the house wouldn't need too much work, as one of the conditions for the loan is that everything is brought up to code within three years. So of course the electricity needs to be completely redone, as well as a couple of other things. That effectively closes the door on house #2 for us.

We went back to the website of the realtor we've been working with, and saw a house for sale that was well under our budget but instead of having a garden, only has a porch. The house is quirky and charming, and we pretty much fell in love with it. So of course someone bought it before we could even make an offer on it.

Now we're kind of stuck. All the houses available either need too much work, have too much land, or are simply out of our price range. I've made a radical suggestion to Stéphane: buying an apartment. There is one available that is slightly larger than where we live now, but it is in excellent shape and would allow us to save a bunch of money. I could even start my own business with the money we'd save. The problem is that Stéphane grew up in a large apartment block and has vowed to never live in one again. I will absolutely respect this, but there's a chance this is a smaller building with only a few apartments inside, which he's agreed to. I may go check that out this week.

Meanwhile, I was up for a very cool job about an hour away, but I was to receive a call by the end of the week if I got it, and nothing. So that added a loopty-loop to the roller coaster as well.

So that's where we are now. A lot of disappointment this week, hoping something else will turn up soon!

the other shoe drops

After a few very tense days over the last couple of weeks, I finally learned last Monday that my contract will not be renewed. When I first started to suspect that this would happen, I confronted my boss about it, but in the end, he was just as much in the dark about it as I was, since the decision came from higher up the food chain. Anyway, between the time I started to suspect and I finally knew for sure, I made peace with it and then was ready to be rid of it - as much as I love the extra income, the crap hours and the way this company treats their employees just aren't worth it.

In the meantime, I started looking at my old projects and made another pitch to Stéphane about starting my own business. As much as I love my dear husband, he is not a risk taker and until now has completely resisted the idea, but now he is a little more open to it. And when I say open, I mean perhaps a crack. So I'm slowly starting to piece information together to create a business plan, which will likely take a little time but I'm getting more and more excited about the idea.

Of course, the main thing that's going to slow me down is that I'm going to become a stay at home mom again next week. Three months is huge amount of time at Fry's age and he's not the same boy I hung out with before I started working. It's going to be a heck of a challenge at first, but I'm looking forward to some extra Fry time.

In the end, even after losing my job, we crunched some numbers and decided to make a new bid on the house last week. The last time we bid, four months ago, we got a negative response in about an hour, and now it's been five days. Don't know what that means yet. Even if we don't buy that house, I want out of this apartment, even if it's into another rental. It's just not Little Dude friendly and it's starting to drive me crazy.

So whatever you do, don't feel sorry for me about losing that job! It allowed us to put a little money in the bank, I got some French experience on my resume, I am finally going to get my very own Social Security number (I've been on Stéphane's all this time!) and we got to treat ourselves a little with the Wii and a weekend away coming up. Nothing but good stuff around here!

vivi's first rude Frenchman

Yesterday I was dealing with a client at work, and when he gave me his name I didn't understand it at first, so I asked him to repeat it. When I finally understood it, he said, "Yes, well I speak French, we are, after all, in France, where we speak French. Although if I went to England I would have a rough time, har har!"

What I wanted to say:

"Yes, thank you, Mr. Le Pen*."

"Yes, that's why they hired me, because they couldn't find any French people that could speak to our international clients."

"Yay, I finally found my first actual rude Frenchman!"

What I actually said:

Just as I was biting through my tongue, my boss walked in and said, "Everything ok, Vivi?" I responded through clenched teeth, "Everything is REALLY REALLY GREAT."

I like to think that the jerk realized he'd gone to far because by the end of the transaction he wasn't nearly as smug, but I fumed about it all day. And I have to say the the vast majority of our clients are very sweet and patient and love that I'm one of them there ferners from across the ocean (they usually assume I am either English or Scandinavian - yes I am that pale).

For five years I've been saying that I have yet to meet the stereotypical rude Frenchman, but voila! - I've found him!

*Jean-Marie Le Pen is the founder of the ultra-right wing political group that believes that all immigrants should go away, among other lovely sentiments.

in other news...

Man, I am still fighting the rest of this crud with a little bit of a cough and my nose is blocked up again by the time I go to bed. No wonder I'm not sleeping well. It's gonna be another long day and I really need a nap. *sigh*

Anyway, besides me moaning all the time about how hard my job is, there are some good things that have been going on around here, believe it or not! I think I've mentioned it before, but Stéphane started working on his family tree a few months ago. The last two weeks he was on Winter Break, so he decided to take off for Pas-de-Calais on my two days off last week to throw himself into the state archives to see what he could see (fully endorsed by me, of course, that boy never wants to go off and do stuff so I practically threw him out the door!). He spent six hours straight at the archives the first day and followed up at another office the next day before heading back home and he was able to trace his family back to 1671, and he when he got home he found a way that he may be able to get one more generation before that, but that will be for his next trip. Considering that official record-keeping didn't really start in France before 1739, he's doing really well! It seems that his family pretty much always lived in the same village, or within a stone's throw of that village, just until his father joined the army and moved away. Unfortunately, any family still there are pretty distant cousins, though.

So that's some fun news from Stéphane, now here's mine: I finally bought a Wii! I have been coveting the Wii ever since it came out, but it just wasn't a sensible purchase while we were living on one paycheck. So of course, with my first big paycheck I ran straight to the store to snatch one up (and of course, waiting so long to buy one didn't hurt since it was significantly less than it was when it first came out!). Since then, I've been spending a lot of time on that one auction website (you know the one) looking for fun used games and hoping they come to me in playable condition. I'd really love to find a good strategy game that Stéphane and I could play together, if anyone has any suggestions!

Fry is so so happy to be back at the nounou's this week, he wore himself out yesterday running around the house and playing with the other kids. It just reinforces my desire to stay with this crappy job as long as it takes to get into that house where he can run around safely in his own home and even have a garden to run around in. So, you know, every time I complain about how tired I am, just plug in "but it's so worth it" at the end.

harsh reality

Here's a topic I've been avoiding lately: remember how I opened an Etsy shop? And then I got a full time job? Yeah. Hello, logical conclusion.

I'm completely broken-hearted about closing my Etsy shop. I am brimming with ideas for new products and new designs and writing out patterns and I could go on for days and days, but y'all, I am exhausted. This job takes everything out of me. I suspect it may be the fact that I'm still sick and haven't really been able to rest, plus we're still short staffed and will be for another month, which means double shifts on the weekends for another four weeks, but the only other time in my life I've been so physically exhausted was when Fry was a newborn.

The thing that doesn't help either is that it's not exactly my dream job. I am busting my ass for a job I'm not in love with, which is something I thought I'd never have to do again, *but* then I remember that I live in the region of France that has the highest unemployment rate and I am very lucky to have a job, plus the cold hard fact that we really need to get out of this house.

Oh, this apartment, we loved it so much when we moved in but it is so so dangerous for Fry. Floors like concrete, exposed brick, concrete and wooden beams, and stairs so dangerous he's not allowed to go up without us holding his hands and not allowed down by himself full stop. The upstairs is pretty much off limits because we can't install a gate at the top of the stairs (believe me, we tried). The only safe place Fry can be alone is his bed. For a 15 month old that only stops running when he sleeps, that doesn't work very well.

So. I keep working, I get my magical CDI, and we can buy house #2, which is still available and, more importantly, totally child-friendly. Then I can start looking for a job that I actually like.

But even then, where does that leave time for designing, knitting, and promoting? It doesn't. I have to make a choice between my personal creative outlet and making a better life for my kid.

And the kid wins. Every damn time.

Vivi gets the flu

Oh dear. And the worst possible timing, too.

Fry has been sick for a couple of weeks now, with the perpetual running nose. His nounou's daughter, who also stays home, caught the flu and was pretty much paralyzed by it: she basically slept all day for about three or four days. It was pretty much a foregone conclusion that Fry would get it too.

Of course, when Fry gets the flu, it just means that despite running a fever and loss of appetite, he still runs, just slower. The other problem is that Fry loves to share his microbes with Mommy.

As much as I love encouraging my son to share, he couldn't have done it at a worse time. One of my colleagues quit last week, leaving me and my boss to run the whole show. Last Wednesday I had off, but by the end of the day my fever was bouncing between 102.5 and 100 (39C and 38C) and I was in pain everywhere. Since Fry was still sick after seeing the doctor a week before, we both saw the doctor Thursday morning. He gave both of us a nice long list of medicines and then we had to talk about arret maladie.

Arret maladie, or sick leave, is basically a doctor's note that excuses you from work but still maintain your salary. As you can imagine, it's a perk of the French system that is easily abused (my company is currently paying someone that's been on arret maladie for months, the problem is that the direction has changed two or three times since he went on sick leave and no one knows where he is or even why he's on leave). All you have to do is find a doctor willing to put you on sick leave for "rest" and your're golden. Of course, even if the doctor has put on the form that you're allowed to leave your house, you're still supposed to be home between the hours of 9am and 11am and 2pm and 4pm, but it's rare that anyone actually calls to check up on you.

So, as sick as I was, I felt a little guilty about going on sick leave, essentially leaving my boss to run the entire show by himself. Stéphane had told me that Dr H has a reputation in our town for being very strict about giving out sick leave (and now I understand why he's always available! ugh, this town, I tell you...) so I was really surprised when he gave me four days off! I even asked if I could go back to work after two days and he insisted.

The worst part of the whole ordeal was calling my boss and telling him I was on sick leave. He assured me it was fine, but I still feel really guilty about leaving him like that for four days. My guilt was softened a little yesterday when I still had a fever and I'd completely lost my voice, but I'm still not thrilled about it.

Finally today I think I'll be fever-free and I can feel the symptoms finally starting to fade. I'm so grateful that I have a doctor that gave me the appropriate time off because I probably would have gone back to work on Saturday and made myself worse (Stéphane is always saying that I don't know how to rest, and he's right, I often don't rest when I need it most unless I'm forced to). Tomorrow I'll be back at work, still a little sick but not so much as to pass it on to my boss. Because I sure as hell don't want to run that place for four days alone!

fifteen months

When Fry got sick last week, we thought we might have a break from the kid that never stops running. No dice. He only runs slower and falls down more. *sigh*

One thing I love this month is that Fry has gone interactive! Now he is much more interested in playing with us, as opposed to next to us. His favorite toys recently have been his interactive book that plays music when you press a button that he likes to place on our laps and play and some interlocking blocks that he'll bring us to snap together and then he'll take them back and break them apart.

The biggest change is that we finally broke apart his playpen and used the pieces to keep him corralled in the salon side of the downstairs (which is an open plan with the kitchen). Along with a gate for the bottom of the stairs, this is made a huge difference for Fry, who is free to play on his own and then come grab our attention when he likes (if we're on the computers or something), plus we feel much more relaxed as we're no longer on high alert like we were every moment we let him out of the playpen before.

As for all the changes in his life with Mommy working now, he's handling it like a pro. Even with his first nounou falling terribly ill, he has adjusted again to a new environment with his second nounou without any problems at all, and there's nothing like the way his face lights up when I pick him up in the afternoons. He's still our sweet smiling baby, who is turning into a toddler right before our eyes!

On Working

I have a few thoughts I want to get down about finally working, but I'm not exactly sure where I'm going to go with it. Bear with me here...

I am reminded time and again how naive Stéphane and I were about my moving here. We were sure I'd find work within six months (those two years of my parents falling ill and dying one after the other notwithstanding) and even then we thought I'd be able to pick up where I left off. It never occurred to me that moving countries would be so vastly different for someone fresh out of school and for me, who at 31 years old had a nice little career going and was making more than my husband.

I don't know why I never realized that I'd be literally starting over, but now that I'm revisiting the same sort of job I had 15 or so years ago, it seems so ridiculously obvious. For the first time in my life my boss is Mr So-and-So (as opposed to being on a first name basis) and younger than me. I'm overqualified and over-educated for this job (and for my colleagues), and I sincerely hope I'm not still doing it in five years.

BUT. I also feel like I've cracked the code. I'm on the inside. I have a Social Security number and have money going towards retirement. Every paycheck I bring home means we're that much closer to buying a house. Every month I stay employed is another month I can add to my resume which will only look better and better as time goes on. If I'm offered the CDI (the magical never-ending contract), I'm pretty much set, and at this point I'm feeling more and more confident that this will happen (more thoughts on that in another post). But most importantly, there's no reason I have to stop looking and applying for jobs that I really want.

So I see this job both as a saving grace and a temporary set back. If we can accept the idea of a five to six year break in my career as temporary.

one problem solved...

Some major, major problems at work were resolved yesterday. I was so happy I nearly skipped out of work to my car. I still don't know if this is going to be the long term job for me, and I'm probably going to continue to send out some resumes from time to time in hopes of finding a Monday-Friday job, but I'm totally at peace with work and ready to get on with it. Huge, huge relief there!

Now, the Nanny thing. It turns out that Nounou has contracted Legionellosis, more commonly known as Legionnaires disease. They very nearly waited too long to get medical help and she was in critical condition last we heard, but we're all hoping she makes a full recovery. Stéphane is meeting Mr Nounou this evening to go over some contractual stuff because it will be at least three or four months before she can work again (if she works at all) and we want to get Fry in a stable place that will last at least through the end of the school year. If Nounou is working again after the summer break and I'm still working, we'll probably go back. In the meantime, we've only got a couple of days to find a new nanny.

Meanwhile, Mémère watched Fry Monday and Tuesday, which went off mostly without a hitch. As I mentioned before, we decided that Fry and I would spend the night at Mémère's since I have to be at work so early, but that meant Sunday night I had to struggle with him to settle down and go to sleep. Even if he was a little unruly going to bed, he was a perfect angel with Mémère during the day, much to my relief. Of course, it's easy to be an angel when you get to watch tv and eat cakes all day (I exaggerate but you know), but if you can't spoil grandchildren where's the fun in life, right? I have to admit, it was lovely being only five minutes from work, too. *sigh* If we don't manage to find a Nanny in the next two days, Mémère will watch him again on Friday and then we'll have the weekend to continue our search.

To top off everything else, I'm working on a pretty good head cold. It finally bloomed last night, just in time for two days off. Can't ever catch a break around here!

we knew it was too easy

When I picked Fry up from Nounou's house on Thursday afternoon, I knew she wasn't feeling very well. She had her mother (MIL?) helping her out, which I appreciated. But she looked really rough. So it wasn't entirely a surprise when Stéphane called me at work Friday morning to tell me that Nounou had seen a doctor in the middle of the night and was too sick to take Fry. He was able to take the morning off* and we were able to pass each other at home so I could take the relay.

What I wasn't expecting at all was for Stéphane to tell me on Saturday that Mr Nounou called to tell us that Nounou is in the hospital in critical condition, and they didn't know what was wrong with her. Awesome. My first concern was whether it's something contagious, but except for a little bit of a runny nose, Fry seems perfectly fine. My next concern is obviously for Nounou; I hope she's on the mend very soon!

But right behind that concern is, what on earth are we going to do now? Mémère is going to watch Fry tomorrow and Tuesday while I'm working, and then we'll have to see where we are. My shift starts so early that we've decided that it will be easier for us to spend the night at Mémère's house. This is clearly not a long term solution. It looks like Stéphane and I are going to have to start looking for a new Assistante Maternelle this week.

At one point yesterday, I turned to Stéphane and said, "You know, I thought this whole process went way too smoothly." "I was just about to say the same thing," he responded. *sigh*


* Stéphane called the school as soon as he had the news, but it still took a couple of hours for the substitute teacher to show up, so rather than have the kids screw around with a surveillante (an adult monitor) he took Fry with him to class. The kids loved it, Fry wore himself out, and the kids at least got a little work done. Ha!

not all it's cracked up to be

It was a very frustrating week at work, not to mention exhausting! Six days on, one day off, six days off and finally three days of rest. Today is the third day and I finally can walk without pain in my back and feet. Not that I'm complaining! It feels great to come home and be tired from working, it's very satisfying. I do quite like my job; unfortunately, it's the people I work with that will eventually send me running.

The problem is that it's a young person's job really; something for those that are not yet tied down with family. It's fine for now, but I'm pretty sure it's not something I'd want to do for the rest of my career. The problem I'm having really is that I'm not getting all of my questions answered about important things that I won't go into here but believe me, are quite shocking that I haven't gotten answers yet. Hopefully some of them will be answered this week, as my boss is back from vacation.

I don't mind telling you that I've gone back to the unemployment website and started sending out resumes again. Just because I've found a job doesn't mean I can't keep looking, right?

fourteen months

It seems to me that Fry is literally growing before my eyes, with all the accomplishments he's had this month. Suddenly, his head is nearly clearing his baby jail playpen, and I remember very clearly him standing up the first few times and the top of his head barely reached the top!

Fry doesn't walk as much as he runs. He would probably have a lot fewer bruises if he actually looked where he's walking, though! Now he can get up without pulling up on something and likes nothing better than picking up something and running around the downstairs with it. His room has recently transformed into a play space, with a new carpet and fun new toys, including a wooden wagon filled with wooden building blocks that he loves to pull around the room. He has always been clever with shapes, and if he picks up a toy in one hand, he has to have the identical toy in his other, whether it's a car, a ring, a train, or a circular building block. On the other hand, the downstairs is a veritable mine field, so getting out of the playpen still means heavy supervision and lots of "NO"s from me and Stéphane.

We've been seeing big changes at the table, too. More and more, Fry is interested in feeding himself. It started with him controlling my (or Stéphane's) hand holding the spoon, pulling it towards him when he's ready to eat from it, and every once in a while he insists on holding the spoon and getting it in his mouth. We're definitely letting him go at his own pace and marveling at how he'll take an already small piece of food and pick it apart in minuscule pieces before putting it in his mouth.

Fry is still babbling nice and loud in his own language, and we haven't really had an discernible words apart from "papapapapapa" and "mamamamamamama", but we're not bothered. Since he starts going to Nounou's house on Monday, he'll be hearing quite a lot more French than English, and I'm hoping listening to me babble on to him for the last year will be enough. I'm excited and nervous and sad about this next phase of his life, learning to let him go and share him with others.

One last note, my favorite: I've been trying to teach him kisses, since "doing the bise" is such an integral part of life in France. I show him my kissy face a lot, but he quickly responded by putting his finger up to my mouth. Now sometimes he's even stick his finger out, prompting a kiss. It's my favorite part of the day. He may have a little steak of mischief in him, but he's still my sweet boy!

Happy New Year !

Oh my, what a week! It was an emotional roller coaster, thanks to a colleague who took the Cat's Away, Mice Will Play method to a whole new level. Since I have a difficult time with confrontation, I spent a couple of days working on a pretty sweet ulcer, until, finally, she went too far and was called on the carpet. Sweet, sweet justice, just in time for my day off. One more week until my boss is back in town and hopefully this crap will be cleared up definitively.

Benita asked in the comments of my last post about the "golden ticket," and you're right, there isn't anything like it in the states. It's basically a contract that makes it really difficult for the employee to be fired. One the one hand, the employee has to screw up pretty bad to be let go, by making a number of fautes professionelles, a very serious accusation, for example. It can be a risky proposition for the employers, as there are stories of employees that get their CDI and then stop showing up for work, but more realistically, if they find that their employee is not living up to the employers expectations, it's not so easy to let them go. There is no notion of "Right to Work" here (which is a contradiction in terms, in which an employer can fire an employee without giving a reason and is perfectly legal in many US States). Also, there is no notion of having to earn vacation - everyone that works is entitled to five weeks vacation, starting from their first day of work. Quite different from what I'm used to!

Last weekend we met with the couple that will be watching Fry four days a week. She's the full time nanny, and he works outside the home but helps his wife watch the kids on Mondays when she's supposed to have a "day off." She is also watching a three year old that will start half days at school on Monday, and a two and a half year old. We'll be meeting with them again tomorrow afternoon to go through the details of the contract but we felt really comfortable with them very quickly so we feel like we got lucky and found a good one on the first go. I'm concerned that we don't have time to do a period of adaption (going with him for an hour and then increasing the time alone with the nanny slowly) but she's had to start without the adaption before and it ended up fine. I feel bad putting it on Stéphane but I'm awfully glad it's not me dropping him off next week, I don't think I could handle it! At least I'll be able to pick him up early the first couple of days.

We celebrated the New Year in much the same way we did last year: Fry went to bed at his usual time and Stéphane and I made a delicious fondue (made even better thanks to my Swiss Miss friend, Ms Mac), and then I crashed out around 10ish after watching an old French movies from the '60s (love Bourvil!). Getting up at 5am is taking its toll! In any case, we're really excited about 2010, but all depends on how the next couple of months go with this new job. We're hoping for the best, as this job has the potential to be a really sweet gig and great for all of us! Wishing you the best for your health and happiness in 2010!

all I got for christmas is a full time job

My first week of work is in the can. It's been a real jolt to the system, getting up and having to be functional so early. I can't complain, all my adult life I've been an early bird, but after so many years of practically no activity, getting up off my ass and moving again has been a shock.

I have so many stories that I wish I could share with you but can't. I'm still on a learning curve made even more precipitous by the fact that my boss is currently on vacation and will be leaving the company shortly after her return. Thankfully, she doesn't seem to be the kind of person that leaves a mess in her wake. I like her a lot and I'm disappointed that she's leaving, but them's the breaks. My feelings about my colleagues are... mixed, so I'll let that alone for now.

I did manage to get my contract signed by the skin of my teeth, however. I started on a Saturday so I was supposed to have my contract in hand on Monday. Then they needed to verify some information so that set them back a day, and then they finally sent it Wednesday morning, the "end" of my work week and the day my boss went on vacation. Sheesh. So I'm officially signed up for three month's work with the option of a CDI (a contract of indeterminate time, aka a never ending contract, the "golden ticket" in France) at the end.

Of course, I landed this job at both the best possible time and the worst possible time, depending on how you look at it. It's perfect because I started the job exactly on the day that Stéphane's Christmas break started, otherwise we would have been up the proverbial creek with Fry. Since there is no daycare in Tiny Town and we only have one car, we've decided to place Fry with an assistante maternelle in Tiny Town (I mentioned this in a previous post, yes?). There are approximately 20 available in Tiny Town, and two days before Christmas we managed to find two that have openings. We'll visit them Monday and make a decision. Fry will go four days a week full time during the school year.

Speaking of Fry, what a change this has been for him, too! With very few exceptions, we've been together every single day of his life. With me not coming home until after he's had his lunch and gone down for a nap, I think he was starting to get upset with me, to the point that by Tuesday he was practically ignoring me. Finally having two days off, I'm hoping he understands that it's not like he'll never see me again. I'm hoping we'll find him a nounou that has other kids his age, because it would be so good for him to have some little buddies to play with (and learn how to share with!).

As for the worst timing, I hate that our Christmas suffered a little, though it could have been so much worse - I was fully expecting to be scheduled for Christmas, but it was just dumb luck that I ended up with Christmas Eve and Christmas Day off. I only got half of the gifts finished and we ended up grabbing some last minute gift certificates, but we had a great evening with family on Thursday and I had a well earned veg out day yesterday.

The next two weeks are going to be exhausting, since we're already on a skeleton crew even when the boss is there, so not a lot of rest coming my way for a while. But man, I have to say, there's nothing more satisfying than being tired from a good day's work. I have to admit, I've missed that.

vivi gets a job

ha HA!

What can I tell you, I'm gainfully employed now! I can't tell you much else, though. Here's what I'm willing to share:

-It's in the service industry. The hours are not ideal and I'll be working weekends a lot but I don't have to wear a uniform, so that's a plus.

-I mentioned that I preferred mornings to evenings in my interview and all this week I'm scheduled for morning hours. Getting up three hours before the butt crack of dawn this morning was hard, but being home and done with work for the day at 1pm was quite nice. Don't know if it will always be like that, however.

-The work is not difficult, the time flew by this morning, looks like I'll be speaking English a lot.

-The schedule will vary every week, but it is generally planned out a month in advance, except for the next two weeks (and especially with new personnel).

-By some freak of nature and scheduling, I actually have Christmas Eve and Christmas Day off. I'll most certainly have to work New Year's Eve but as long as I can be with Fry Christmas morning I seriously don't care. I think last year Stéphane and I were already in bed by midnight last year anyway (though Fry was only 8 weeks old at the time, can you blame us?). In any case I'll be home by midnight, which is the most important part anyway.

Speaking of Fry, we're obviously going to have to come up with some day care solutions. Since there isn't a real day care in Tiny Town, and we only have one car (so Stéphane can't take/drop off Fry outside of Tiny Town), our next solution is an assistante maternelle, or a nanny. The town hall keeps a list of nannies and it will be up to us to call and find one that is willing to take him. So Stéphane will be doing that first thing Monday.

So, that's me working. How about that?

Winter Wonderland

It started snowing yesterday morning and it's hardly stopped. The roads were a mess yesterday getting to my job interview, but the Director was very impressed that I showed up anyway (and said so at least three times), so major points there. Since they hadn't salted/sanded the roads before I got there, the roads were a bit perilous in town but much better by the time I left.

Last night we had dinner out with some of Stéphane's colleagues at Tiny Town's Moroccan restaurant (our favorite by a long shot, amazing food and outstanding service!). We were the lucky ones this time as we were literally around the corner from our house (though we still had to drive in order to bring Fry's high chair) as most of the teachers away from Tiny Town. By then it had already been decided that the school buses would not run today. Considering our school is the central school for all the little villages surrounding Tiny Town and many buses have to take service field roads to get here, I think they made the right decision. Still, that doesn't mean school is canceled, and anyone that can get to school is still required to come. No big deal, since today is the last day before Christmas holidays.

Here's what we woke up to:





Hey, the apartment across the street is available again!

And it's still coming down. It's gorgeous, and I'm hoping to manage to take Fry out in it at some point. The only problem is he doesn't have any snow pants or boots. I didn't bother to buy any because it hasn't snowed like this since 2005. We'll figure something out! In any case, it isn't going to last, as Tuesday we're expecting highs of around 10C (50F).

As for the job, I'll find out this evening if I got it, and if I did, it starts tomorrow.

vivi gets a break

I hit a pretty low point yesterday morning. I finally just cried out to the universe, "I need a break!"

Luckily, the universe was listening.

I finally got a call about a job. I have an interview this afternoon. And even if I don't get the job, finally getting a call after job searching for so long makes me feel so much better. Like I actually am employable.

I don't know if it's me personally, or the culture I come from, but most of my anxiety over looking for a job has stemmed from the feeling that if I'm not getting calls for interviews, then there's something wrong with me. I have experience! I have a diploma! I'm bilingual! Why don't you like me???

Stéphane finally talked me down. It's not you, he said. There are no jobs. Of course employers can be super picky when they have dozens of replies for every job offer. Stop taking it personally, he said.

And he's right. Plus, I've been here before. During a similar job hunt before moving back to the Carolinas, I answered an ad for a secretary in Florida in 1996. There were so many applicants for that job, they were taking us in groups of ten to fill out applications and tests. But it was a hell of a lot easier to go get a job at Bennigan's at 23 than it would be now (even if we had a road filled with twenty chain restaurants in these parts).

Even if I don't get this job, getting an interview gave me all the confidence I need to keep looking. But that doesn't mean I don't want to nail this interview!

The only problem now is that it's snowing like a mother out there. The universe still likes a good giggle now and then.

I have no idea what to say

So here's a tweet cloud:



(Still knitting for Christmas, job hunting, on snow watch. I do have a post in me, will write ASAP!)

it's the most horrible time of the year

Man, things are getting me down! The weather has settled into its gray steel phase which will last until Spring (although we're having some very rare sunshine this morning, thankfully) which doesn't help. Fry and I keep exchanging colds. December means the end of term for Stéphane, so he's stressed and tired and working extra hours to get grading finished and seeing parents nearly every night so he's worn out by the time he gets home. I've been sending off resumes at a rate of about one a day, which wouldn't be so bad if I ever got any calls on them, but now it seems available jobs are tapering off and probably will continue to do so until the new year.

I finally managed to decorate for Christmas a little. Fry's stocking is up, so are some of my mom's handmade decorations, and I bought a small plastic tree because the downstairs is already dangerous enough for Fry, especially now that he's walking, we decided a real tree just isn't worth it this year. It's going to be another crafty Christmas for my in-laws but that's going slowly and it seems I can't get anything done.

I can't remember the last time I slept through the night. There are things swirling in the background that I don't write about here that are getting me down as well. I have some health stuff going on that will probably require medication, which does not make me happy at all.

Bah, humbug.

in which Fry gets a shot

Yesterday I took Fry to Tiny Town's salle des fêtes to be vaccinated against H1N1, aka la Grippe A or the swine flu. In France, the vaccinations are being given in "vaccination centers" around the country and are being staffed (and by some accounts, understaffed) by local doctors, nurses and army medical personnel. While anyone has the right to be vaccinated, those that meet certain requirements have been sent a voucher to ensure they will be vaccinated in priority. Someone I know on an forum in Switzerland had her daughter vaccinated yesterday as well, but she said that it was with typical Swiss precision that she had an appointment and even a parking voucher ahead of time, so it took no time at all. My experience, even out here in the French boonies, was... not the same.

Our vaccination center was open from 12pm until 4pm, so we got there around 2:30, hoping to beat the crowds of kids on their lunch break. There were probably a good twenty people ahead of me, but we didn't wait long; five minutes after arriving, we were approached by a volunteer and asked to move to the front of the line (children under two are considered a priority). I have to admit I felt a little guilty, but not guilty enough to say no! On checking in, I was told that I could have one as well, but I declined (Stéphane and I had already decided to skip the vaccination). The next station was for filling out paperwork (name, address, parental consent, general medical questions, etc.). After that, we sat down with a doctor, which just happened to be Dr H, our regular doctor. Dr H marked Fry for a half dose (typical for babies under 18 months) and he'll have the other half in three weeks. Then we waited for a vaccination bay to open up (I think there were three families ahead of us).

Fry was great with his shot as always, just a quick ten second cry and it was over (irrationally proud, me??). I was a bit annoyed that we had to wait twenty minutes before we could leave, as we certainly don't have to wait in the doctor's office after a regular vaccination and I felt like this was a total CYA move, but whatever, we only had to wait ten and it was over. All in all, it took us an hour from sitting down at the entry to walking out the door. Thank goodness we were able to skip the line! Fry didn't have any reaction to the shot at all, didn't even have a small fever. Now whether or not it's actually is worth all the trouble will remain to be seen!

Thanksgiving Weekend

We had a fabulous time at the annual French Thanksgiving weekend with our friends Doc and Marc! We were quite low on Americans this year, with Doc and I being the only ones in attendance, but we were blessed with the presence of Mr and Ms Mac, who don't speak French so I hogged them all to myself all night and talked so much I lost my voice! I made a great big dish of Fat Potatoes Fat Fat and we enjoyed turkey, dressing, green bean casserole, others "enjoyed" Brussels sprouts (weirdos) and we all devoured a million different desserts. Fry charmed everyone as usual and did very well despite the lack of sleep.

Speaking of Fry, last Thursday night, free of his baby jail, he pulled himself up on the tv stand as he often does, but then turned to me in the kitchen and walked to me, then walked around the downstairs (one big room) twice, and then went up the stairs alone (with Papa right behind him)! He's officially walking without help now, and that's truly something to be thankful for!

house #3

So yesterday we saw another house. Well, we sort of saw a house. We saw part of a house?

Ok, let me explain. This house, on paper, has everything we want; it's not on a main road, it's got plenty of bedrooms, a nice big garden, even a garage. Unfortunately, we were very much turned off because the of the way it's presented. The former owner has passed away, and the family hasn't moved a damned thing since she died. The house has been in this state for six months. The problem is, we can't magically see behind the furniture, so heaven knows what its hiding. The house needs some serious love; the electricity needs to be completely redone, the stairwell and upstairs need the walls refinished, and there are more than a few cracks in the plaster, and that's just what we *can* see.

The fact that the person that showed us the house clearly didn't want to be there and hardly knew anything about the house at all (I do think knowing where the water heater is is kind of essential) left a nasty taste in our mouths. It's a shame, because I love the layout of this house, I think it's perfect for us, and the garden could be really wonderful. The truth is, it would end up being more expensive than house #2 in the long run, which is Stéphane's favorite so far. So this one is going by the wayside as well.

Since I'm here, let me take this opportunity to wish my American friends and family a very happy Thanksgiving! This is my favorite holiday and I'm really looking forward to celebrating it this weekend with a bunch of friends! You don't have to be American, though, to be thankful for your health, your family and your friends! Have a wonderful holiday weekend!

clingy

Friday, Fry finally went back to his weekly playgroup for the first time in three (or is it four?) weeks. He's really been overdue. I hate the fact that we don't get to visit with our family in Troyes very often and all of our friends live pretty far away, so Fry doesn't get as much interaction with other people as I would like. Plus, I won't lie, it's nice to have an afternoon for myself!

For the first time, Fry flipped out on arrival. It didn't help that they changed rooms at the local rec center and there was a new assistant. Fry was super shy, didn't want to let go of me, and finally I pulled his doudou out from his diaper bag (which is pretty exceptional, as this lovie only stays in his bed, Fry hasn't carried around a preferred toy yet), handed him off to an assistant he knows well, and I took off. I had a lovely couple of hours to myself knitting and playing on the computer.

When I picked him up though, they told me that it took them twenty minutes to calm him down and they nearly called me out of desperation. I figure it must have been pretty bad if the professionals couldn't calm him down! They finally had to pull out the ultimate weapon - the pacifer (which he also only gets in bed). By the time I picked him up, he was happily playing, though he was happy to see me when he saw me. Of course, he got a little nervous because I didn't pick him up fast enough!

I know he's getting to that age where separation is going to be a little difficult, but to be honest, it doesn't bother me too much, I know it's normal. I much prefer this to the alternative; there is one little boy who always cries when his mother comes to get him because he doesn't want to leave. I think I'll keep my clingy kid.

in which nothing gets done

Sometimes it seems like the more I struggle to get myself together, the easier everything falls apart. Right when I'm ready to head back to aerobics, I catch whatever is was that Fry had two weeks ago (and is still lingering on). Thursday I went to the pharmacy to pick up some cold medicine, but by Saturday morning it was clear that this was no cold. I managed to get in to see a doctor Saturday afternoon, whose eyebrows raised quite high when he saw my temperature (but I didn't), and I left with a prescription for some pretty powerful antibiotics and some cortisone therapy. The difference between Saturday and Sunday was astonishing.

Even so, I'm still not well enough to bounce around in Tiny Town's rec center, much to my chagrin. I'm fighting with yarn these days, trying to get designs from my head to the needles and struggling with it terribly. The problem with selling on Etsy is that the pressure is on to list items and list them quickly, and my products are a bit too detailed and take too long to create. But still, putting myself out there like this and getting positive feedback has been a real boost to the confidence, even if it's slow going.

A final note about house #2 - the agency called us Saturday evening to let us know that they did in fact run our last offer by the owners, and it's still too low. At least we got the final word, which makes me feel a lot better. Assurances have been made that if either party changes their minds, word will be sent right away. I'm hoping to get word to the notary about visiting the next house sometime today.

That's what's happening in our neck of the woods!

in which we make our first bid

Don't get too excited my friends...

SO. Yesterday I visited the first of the two notaries in Tiny Town. I was very surprised to learn that they were also listing house #2 but at a very affordable price! So affordable, in fact, that we were ready to make an offer, but what we didn't realize is that we were obligated to make an offer through the agency that showed us the property. My brain is still boggling that a house can be listed by more than one agency, but hell, we're not in Kansas anymore, so I'm going with it.

Anyway, the lady at Notary 1 told me that she would call the agency and tell them we were interested. This morning, after visiting Notary 2 (and finding out they had house #1 listed, aha ha ha) and buying a baguette, the man from the agency nearly ran me down in the street! So I basically told him what we wanted to offer (which was a reasonable offer with the reduced price of the notary but probably sounded ridiculous to the agency) and he told us he would get back to us.

It didn't take us long to get an answer - in the form of a counter-offer. We did some number crunching and I even visited the bank, but when we got home I replayed the message with the counter-offer, which we'd played on the speakerphone. Hearing it more clearly, I realized that the counter-offer was the final offer. Which was still over our budget. Game over.

Tomorrow's a holiday in France, so nothing will happen, but Thursday I'll call the agency and tell them no. Then I'll call Notary 1 about another house they have listed that sounds interesting but needs a bit of work. Hopefully we'll see house #3 this weekend. Cross your fingers kids, because it looks like house #3 is the last house available in our budget in all of Tiny Town for the time being... (Remember, Tiny Town has a population of 5000 - the chances of another house with our requirements and in our budget coming available very soon are pretty low!)

house #2

Last week we got a call from the agency that they had a new listing for us, so we visited it Saturday afternoon. Another maison de ville, this one is pretty much the other end of the spectrum from house #1 and, unfortunately, just outside of our budget. We don't regret looking at it, though. As Stéphane said, now we've seen the extremes of what we're looking for and it will help us have a reference for the future.

This particular house is, quite literally, built to withstand just about anything. I didn't know it, but Tiny Town was 75% destroyed by bombing in WWII, and the agent told us that many of the homes that were built just after the war were constructed with the idea in mind that the bombing could happen again. Like the first house, it's got three stories, but that's about the only thing in common. The former owner was 96 years old and was very active in her home and garden until a sudden illness took her life, and it's obvious that she took amazing care of her home. The hardwood floors and oak stairways are gorgeous, the wallpaper is dated but in perfect condition, and the tiles and appliances are also dated but seem to be in excellent condition. There is way more basement and attic space than we need, a veranda with sliding glass windows, a narrow but amazing garden and a garage with a private entrance. The only thing against it is the only bathroom is on the first floor and the bidet in the bathroom would have to go (eventually). Absolutely ready to move in with no problems and rooms could be updated as money becomes available.

We do know that the owners are willing to negotiate, but probably not as much as we would need to make an offer. It's only been on the market for a week but we do know someone else was looking at it the same day. We're not holding our breath for this one, but it was nice to see it all the same. This week I'm going to try to visit one or both of the notaries in Tiny Town and see if they have anything for us.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Fry has been terribly sick this week. He started coughing a bit on Monday and by Wednesday morning he sounded like a 70 year old with a three pack a day habit and a fever. We saw Dr H, who didn't like the look of his throat at all, and we've been fighting Fry to shove antibiotics and cough syrup down his gullet ever since. Thank goodness we're done with the medicine tomorrow, hopefully this will be mostly cleared up by then! (Though it must be said, he hasn't had a fever since Thursday and he's getting his appetite and energy back.)

Finally, I answered an ad for a part time job in Tiny Town today. Please keep your appendages crossed for me!

one year

I can't believe it was a year ago today that I woke up with contractions and six hours later our Fry was born! It's so ridiculously cliché, but it really does go by so fast!

Our little boy is right on the cusp of walking (more than three or four steps on his own, I should add, since he's been doing that for a couple of months now) and talking. I have a feeling he's just going to walk up to me one day and say, "Hey Mommy, what's up?" The only time he stops moving is when there's music, and even then he's started dancing. Otherwise, he loves flipping through his books, throwing stuff out of bed or his baby jail, and stuffing everything he can get his hands on in his mouth. Fry is still tall for his age (he's half in 18 month clothes, half in 2 year clothes), a full head of hair and at least seven teeth (because honestly? it's sharp in there and I'm not sticking my finger in there unless I have to!). He eats anything we propose to him now, and the only thing he doesn't really like is water!

While he certainly is starting to make it known that he's displeased when he doesn't get his way, he's still a very happy little boy. I get a huge smile every morning, and another one when he goes to bed. Everyday I'm grateful for the chance to watch him discover the world. Happy birthday, my sweet boy!

return from the north

Stéphane has been very interested lately in his family's roots. After his father died, he remembered his father showing him some old family documents and with the help of his mother, dug them back out. They include his grandfather's wedding contract, identity card, and some military records. Unfortunately, we don't have a lot more to go on, except for vague memories from his mother, aunts and uncles. So, we decided to spend a couple of days of his Toussaint vacation in the land of his forefathers, Pas de Calais.



Pas de Calais is already my favorite region of all the places I've visited in France, and I could easily see us living there (who knows, maybe we'll retire there?), so I jumped at the chance to see it in Fall for the first time. We were quite lucky with the weather, thanks to a bit of Indian Summer this week, and the region is just after peak with autumn leaves.



Unfortunately, we hit a few dead ends in our research, and since we wanted to do so much in so little time, I'm afraid Fry suffered a bit with few naps and not a lot of freedom. Stéphane continues to do his research online for the moment, but we're planning on going back next summer for a longer period and renting a gite (a summer rental home, the region is crawling with them!). That way we won't feel so rushed to visit family, do a little sightseeing, take Fry to the beach for the first time, and do a bit of research. I'm already looking forward to it!

house #1

So, Saturday afternoon we visited a house for sale in Tiny Town, only a ten minute walk from here. We were surprised by how much work the house needs, since it wasn't mentioned at all in the ad, but we are still pretty interested in it. The house is a maison de ville, or townhouse, meaning it shares walls with homes on both sides. It's just over a hundred years old and is solid as a rock, so no worries there (which is one of the reasons we're interested in older homes anyway).

The major problem is that the entire electricity needs to be replaced, which thankfully still falls within our budget. The former owners fancied themselves as home improvement types, but just a couple of the "improvements" include a cooktop built in wood (wtf???) and a trendy bowl sink supported with 2 x 4s. Every room needs cosmetic improvement but that is something we can tackle in good time.

On the good side, the rooms are comfortably large, the kitchen includes an American sized fridge (woohoo!), the garden is the perfect size for barbecues, a small garden and space for Fry to play, and tons of storage space.

Seeing as this is our first house, we're trying to temper our interest, especially since this house has only been on the market for a couple of months. We are slowly going forward; we'll pass by the agency again this weekend with a couple of questions and if we like the answers we'll make another appointment to visit the house again with a couple of family members. The real estate agent told us that he may have another house soon with what we're looking for as well, so we don't feel pressured at all about this house, but to tell you the truth, I really like this one. As the agent said, if someone else swoops in and buys this house, it wasn't meant to be ours in the first place. I really like that guy.

We're taking off in the morning for a few days, so have a great end of the week (and enjoy this gorgeous weather if you're in France!) and hopefully I'll be back on Saturday with a few pictures for you!

oh what a week

Man, there is so much going on I don't know where to start! Ok, let's start here...

The Etsy shop seems to have started off on a good foot; I had two sales this weekend, and while I was trying not to get my hopes up, I'm so pleased that I've had my first sales within two weeks of opening up. That being said, actually sending away things I've spent so much time making is a bit harder than I thought it would be - I've actually become attached to the little buggers! I'm so glad that my first sale is going to a friend, it sort of softens the blow a little bit. Meanwhile, I'm trying to juggle working, giving Fry as much attention as possible and keeping the house from falling down around our ears. That last one is proving really hard so today it's got the priority.

Last Wednesday, we all sat down at the bank to talk about a little thing called Loans. We now have an idea of what our budget is for house hunting. It's a little lower than we hoped, but I think for first time buyers we'll be ok and we agree that this won't be the house we live in forever. We've already got an appointment to look at a house on Saturday and next week we'll try to get in to see a couple of notaries (in France, they also have the right to do realty, it's whole different ball game than notaries in the States).

Yesterday was Tiny Town's fall festival. Stéph was down for the count with a nasty migraine but Fry and I had a great time! There were easily twice as many vendors than I've ever seen before (though many of them were selling the same crap so take that with a grain of salt). Fry loved people watching, plus we saw two fanfares (little marching bands! I Will Survive, the marching band version was really fun), samba drums and dancers, and we didn't even get to the side with the amusement rides and more vendors! Plus, the weather was perfect, sunny skies, nice and crisp like Fall is supposed to be. Gorgeous! The only thing missing were roasted chestnuts.

Oh, a little update about my leg. It's much better but not nearly 100%. It's a good thing I saw the doctor and he said to wait four to six weeks, because I almost certainly would have gone back to the aerobics class this week and made it worse. It's still a little stiff in the mornings but I'm walking on it alright, with the occasional twinge now and again.

And that's what's happening around these parts, it feels great to be busy again!

our forest

The weekend before I messed up my leg, we went hunting for mushrooms. It's been years since we've done it, though Stéph grew up mushroom hunting and knows exactly what to look for (and has two excellent annotated guides in case he's not sure). So after around at work for the best forest, we headed off to the Forêt d'Orient National Park, a little east of Troyes. I've been to the lake a few times before, but this is the first time I've been exploring in the forest.

I think we found a little piece of heaven:



It was far too dry for mushrooms, but my leg was feeling well enough to try again this past weekend. Though we had some rain last week, the floor of the forest was only damp so we didn't find much, and what we did find had been nibbled on by the local residents. Since the temperature has dropped these last couple of days, we may not have any luck at all for mushrooms this year, but we may go gallivanting in the forest some more anyway!

crap.

Well first the non-crap - thank you so much for your lovely comments yesterday! They were a much needed boost of confidence all through the day!

The day ended on a very sour note, unfortunately. As you know, I started going to an aerobics class here in Tiny Town. Yesterday was my third class and it was a step class. The first time we did step, I noticed that my legs were started to cramp up so I stopped using the step and continued on the floor. Well, last night they were starting to cramp up and I had just processed the thought, "oh, I should stop using the step" when I came down a little funny and I felt a huge RIIIIIIIIIP in my right leg.

I managed to hobble into the next room to try and regain my composure but the longer I sat the worse it got. I ended up having to leave the class in the middle, hobble out to the car and drive home. Getting up the stairs last night to go to bed was a real adventure.

Now, we've just come back from the doctor (and I say we because Stéph took the morning off to give me a hand) and it's worse than both of us thought: I've torn a muscle/tendon on the interior of my calf. That means I have to limit going up and down the stairs in the house, try not to walk for at least a week, no driving for a week and no sport for four to six weeks. I have to wear an uber sexy band on my leg (which is on order and Stéph will pick it up tomorrow) and put gel on my leg three times a day.

I think by next week I should be able to walk again but the rest of this week is going to be a fun adventure and a lot of frustration for Fry, I'm afraid. I know it could have been much worse (the people around me thought I turned my ankle at first, and I'm happy it wasn't a knee!), but this is super discouraging!!

So it seems my attempt at getting in shape is over nearly before it started! I will be back at it hopefully in November, with some extra warming up at home before I go and paying better attention to my body while I'm there. This getting old crap sucks!

And Lo, Suis le fil, the Boutique is born

Here is a post I've been wanting to write for a long, long time.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Suis le fil, an Etsy shop.

I've been blathering on about wanting to start some sort of business practically since I got off the plane five years ago. It took nearly that long to figure out what I wanted to do. Not quite five years ago, Stéph took me to Provins for the yearly medieval festival and I thought, "This, I want to do this!" Ok, but doing what? Three years ago, I learned how to knit. And finally, six months ago, I decided to try to combine my love of history and knitting (two great tastes that taste great together!) and take a huge leap of faith.



I started creating drawstring pouches lined with linen, using motifs from extant bags combined with original designs. Then I started putting those motifs on other things as well.



I'm not quite ready for the medieval festival, but I've created something I'm truly proud of and am happy to share it.

I'll keep most of my blogging about the shop at my other blog, Suis le fil, but this is too big for me not to share. I hope you enjoy it!

eleven months

Fry is growing like a weed and learning so quickly now that I'm sure I'm going to miss a few things! He's turned into quite the chatterbox, though still no words we recognize. His favorite activity right now is turning the pages of his baby books (and dang near tearing them apart, much to my chagrin, but I think they'll hold up in the end) and doing laps in the living room. He will either crawl at lightning speed or grab my hands and take off walking! This also means that we're having to find special hiding places for all our stuff in order to make the living room "baby proof," which is neigh near impossible because of the apartment itself but we're doing what we can.

I've been a big supporter of soft soled shoes but once Fry really started walking we all noticed that he'd drag one of his feet. As much as I hated to do it, he's been walking in traditional baby boots for the last couple of weeks and the dragging has all but disappeared. Once he's more comfortable with walking, we'll go back to soft soled shoes (especially in the house!) and keep the boots for the very worst weather.

Other than that, he's doing super great! He's doing three hours a week at the halte garderie, loves visiting his mémère, and is still super friendly and smiley wherever we go. And now Mommy just has about four weeks to come to terms with the idea that her baby isn't really that much of a baby anymore...

Edited to add: I knew I forgot something. We've also seen signs of a little boy that doesn't like it when he doesn't get his way. The worst is when he's crawling around or getting into something he shouldn't and Papa or I pick him up - that's when we get a little attitude. But what made me remember is that when I picked him up from the halte garderie just now, one of the women told me, "this one's going to have character!" and I thought "oh no, what's he done??" He's got a stubborn streak, which I hope serves him well further on down the road. Now we've just got to figure out how to harness it!

a sneak peek

I've got a big announcement coming... but you'll have to wait until next week to see it. Tune in Monday, friends!

signs of autumn

I took my camera with me on our morning walk today and found quite a few leaves starting to change color. The trees are lovely but it's the vines that turn bright red that really get to me!

This past week was pretty crazy. I went to an aerobics class here in Tiny Town on Wednesday evening. Besides the fact that I tore a muscle doing step aerobics (they don't seem to be very big on warming up - must do it on my own before I guess), I enjoyed it and am going to sign up. The price is very reasonable and I'm going to try to go twice a week. I would like to go tonight but Stéph is fighting something off, so we'll see how he's feeling when he gets home from work.

I thought I found the right place to have my documents translated and sent them off, only to have them sent right back with a note that they don't do what I need. I tried to call the nationality service at the courthouse this morning, as their only hours are from 9am to noon, but of course got no answer. This is starting to get time sensitive, as I've already got six weeks on one document and everything is supposed to be under three months when they're turned in. If I can't get someone on the phone tomorrow I'll have to go in person on Wednesday.

Fry is having a great time at the halte garderie on Fridays and this week he'll go for the full three hours for the first time. I think I'm going to come home and do NOTHING and it's going to be great!

mystery solved

Yesterday I had my appointment with the allergist in Troyes. The appointment itself was pretty amusing and the results were, in my opinion, pretty surprising.

This may not shock you so much if you're American, but if you've spent any time at all in France you might be shocked to learn that I waited upwards of an hour in the waiting room. (I wrote about my very first experience with French doctors way back in the stone ages, here, and generally find that wait times are very short here.) I was glad I brought my knitting with me, but even so, I was curious why the other guy in the waiting room was so antsy and another fellow that came in after me saw that there were only two of us, looked at his watch, and left! But hey, I couldn't be bothered, luckily - Fry was with his grandma, Stéph had his key to get in the house after work, I had my knitting, no problem!

Once I finally made it into the office, I was very pleased to find that Dr. Allergy is a very sweet woman, maybe ten years older than me, very chatty and personable. Once she ferreted out that I'm American (I get "what an adorable accent!" all the time, whether they mean it or say it as a way to find out where I'm from is dependent on the person, really), we had to have a ten minute conversation about her little sister who's married to American and has lived in NYC for 25 years (how is it that I manage to meet everyone that has a relative in America?) and a rather amusing story she told about her last visit there, and then at last we got to my allergies (and you can start to see why an hour behind is probably normal!).

Well, we went over my allergy history, and she brought up an important point that I hadn't thought of before, that it should be rather unlikely that I should have pollen allergies on two different continents, but that's certainly what I assumed it was. Everyone's been saying that the pollen was out of control this past Spring and Summer, so what else could it be? So we did the prick test, and I was very surprised to learn that I'm not allergic to pollen at all.

Nope, I get to have a relatively rare (at least in France, according to Dr Allergy, anyway) allergy to Alterneria, an atmospheric mold that grows outside in the right conditions, being very hot and damp. This is the mold that grows on old leaves in the forest and can damage crops in some cases. It also happens to be the same whether it's growing in France or in America, so it would explain why I never had allergies growing up in Florida (too close to the coast where it is hot and damp but not enough foresty cover for mold to grow), suffered terribly in Upstate SC, and can suffer from it again on a completely different continent. So not only were the pollen counts very high here in France this summer, the conditions were right for an outbreak of Alterneria.

Dr Allergy is still sending me for a blood test to confirm, as well as an x-ray of my sinuses, but most likely the treatment will be the same that my regular doctor gave me, which works perfectly. Even if nothing changes, it is such a relief to know exactly what I'm allergic to and what to look out for in the future!


PS: I didn't leave the doctor's office until 6pm for a 3:30 appointment. She insisted I call my MIL from her phone to let her know I was on the way. I guess I would usually be, at the very least, annoyed under such circumstances, but she was so very nice and very clearly explained everything so well that I'm actually looking forward to my next appointment!

and the other shoe drops

I knew something was wrong. I didn't have to get on a scale to know I'd gained a bunch of weight, but sometimes it takes getting on one to get the reality check. But it's not just the fact that I've gained five kilos (over 10 pounds) in the last four months, but the results of the blood test that's got my attention.

My blood sugar is fine, my cholesterol level is a little high, but not too much. But my triglyceride level is really high. Like, scary high. Like, double the recommended level high.

We're changing my pill perscription (yes indeedy, birth control can be a contributing factor, isn't that fun?) and my icky doctor (who ordered the blood test just for this reason after being off the pill for a few years) suggested seeing my regular doctor, as he thinks I may need additional medication. I'd like to see if I can bring it back down with my diet, since I know damned well I haven't been eating right, before my next check up at the beginning of December.

Heart disease is a big killer in my family, and I'm not kidding around when I say that I feel like I've just passed the last warning sign before the edge of the cliff. It's time to turn this boat around, kids. You wanna help? I'll take every low-cholesterol non-cardboard-tasting recipe you've got, kindly deposited in the comments box. I and my heart thank you.

I love fall.

I mean, I seriously love Fall. I love the "back to work" feeling about it (especially in France, when many companies actually shut down for most of August!), the change in temperature, the changing of the wardrobe, the changing of the menu...

Speaking of the menu, I've seriously got to get a handle on that. I've gained a ridiculous amount of weight that I haven't been able to shake off since Fry was born. Now that he's been out of my body longer than he was in it, I don't really feel like I can use that excuse any more. I just feel really gross. Hopefully, getting back in our routine of a couple of walks a day will help.

Now that Fry is getting more mobile on his own, I think chasing him around is going to help, too. Recently I've started making a half hour pit stop in the park with Fry in the afternoons to let him stretch out his legs a bit, since there isn't too much room for it in our house. I bring the jeans quilt with me (even though it's unfinished, though I have to admit it's pretty sturdy like it is and it's not a bad size, maybe I'll just sew a sheet on the back or something? Anyway...) and a scooter/walking toy that Doc handed down to us. Of course, he's only interested in stuffing as many rocks and leaves in his mouth as possible before I scrape them out, but I suppose that's par for the course. He doesn't seem to be in any hurry to get up and walk any more, either. It's as though he's thinking "hey, we all know I can do it, what's the rush?" I wholeheartedly agree.

One other thing I wanted to mention about Fry - he's really started to get interactive with us, at last! In the last week he's started saying "mamamammamamamammamama......." you get my drift. I'm not sure he's quite got the connection that he's saying my name, but he knows he can get my attention by saying it! He's also started playing what we call "the ball game" with Stéphane. Stéph will roll a ball in his direction and Fry will pick it up and place it in Stéph's outstretched hand! He doesn't make it every time but he just beams at Papa the whole time. Good stuff.

I got another document yesterday to add to my citizenship folder. The last one should be here in the next week. Apparently I'm supposed to send at least our marriage license to a special office in Nantes to be translated (we were married in the States, or this wouldn't be an issue, obviously). The good news is that since it's a government agency, it should only be a couple of euros to have it done. The bad news is I have to ship it off and hope it comes back in a timely manner. I'm going to call them to see if they'll do my other American documents as well, which will save us a pretty penny!

five years?!

You would think something as big as my fifth anniversary of living in this country, as well as starting this blog, would ring a bell in my brain, but alas, it went right by me. Considering that it coincides with la rentrée, you'd think it would loom rather large in my head. And yet, last week all I could think about getting back into our school routine. Though I suppose I do have an excuse - I never had a pint sized whirlwind flying through the house before to distract me.

Here's to five years in France, five years of blogging, and thanks to all of you that continue to read my drivel follow along, the friends I've made throughout the world, and to my husband for putting up with the culture shock, the identity crises, and all the drama that comes with marrying a ferner. Chin-chin !

ten months

Dang, I knew I'd miss a month, and Fry turned nine months old a few days after we arrived in the States and it was next to impossible to get in front of a computer for the time it takes to write one of these up. Also, I should be writing down his accomplishments as they happen, because after a couple of weeks everything either blends together or I get so used to his new abilities that I take them for granted!

Fry has been crawling in fast forward for quite a while now, but we didn't realize just how fast he could go until we were at Grandma's. We'd set him down in the living room and he'd take off like a rocket through the kitchen and on to the front porch! There's a good sized step leading onto the porch and Fry had that thing figured out a couple of days after we arrived. That doesn't mean I'm letting him anywhere near our slatted staircase, though!

Five teeth have already come through, including one of his front teeth. Considering he's always had two teeth come in at a time I'm hoping the other front tooth isn't far behind. He can pretty much mow through a biter biscuit now and makes short work of the coconut cookies Grandma sent back with us (spoiled rotten, this kid is!). Fry is thankfully still not a fussy eater and only hesitates when a new texture is introduced.

The biggest news, of course, is that he has already taken a few steps on his own! We've been holding his hands and "helping" him walk for weeks now, but it was only in the safety of his baby jail that he spontaneously let go and took three steps towards me, much to my amazement! He's taken a few steps again here and there (and Stéph finally saw him do it - I was afraid he thought I'd made it up!), but all in the play pen. Believe me, we are in no hurry for him to start running around the house but we're very proud of his early accomplishment!

Like many bilingual kids (I speak English at home, Stéph responds in French, we've been doing this since before Fry was born so it's completely natural now), Fry hasn't started speaking yet, but he's a champion babbler and "talks" all the time.

Right this moment, Fry loves opening and closing things (doors and books mostly, he hasn't figured out drawers and cabinets yet!) and is still mesmerized by music. We had the great chance to hear lots of live music in the States, including a bluegrass jam at a local café, my dear friend's husband, a professional musician and teacher, played his upright bass for him, and my cousin Henry played a good bit of piano for him as well. This is something I definitely hope to continue!

The only "bad" thing I can report right now is that he's starting to get very clingy and cry when we put him down or when he goes to bed. I'm guessing this is the infamous separation anxiety rearing its head, so we're trying to balance being firm and assuring at the same time. Like I seem to say every month, things are about to get more interesting around here!

C'est la rentrée !

Here we are again, the first of September. Teachers report today (students go back Thursday) as well as everyone else in France that takes the month of August off. Once again, Mother Nature is following right along with the calendar and it's gone all dark and rainy (though, to be fair, it's actually the remnants of the hurricane that flew up the east coast of the US a couple of weeks ago).

I spent this first morning "back to work" puttering around the house tidying up and trying to wear Fry down (it worked, he's passed the sacred hour and a half mark of his noon nap!). And of course as soon as I typed that he woke up.... I'll never learn!

Anyhoo, I mentioned before that we've got a couple of big projects going on. They are not things that have to be worked on constantly; in fact, they're going to kind of run in the background for a while. For example, the first thing is that I'm preparing to request French citizenship. There are a few documents that need to be gathered and then translated before we head back to the courthouse in Troyes. We grabbed a copy of our marriage license when we were in Asheville a few weeks ago, and we're now waiting for a copy of my birth certificate and my criminal record. Hopefully we will get everything gathered and translated before three months expires, or else the whole thing starts over again. Good times!

So, why citizenship? Well, I knew I'd do it eventually, since we are going to live here indefinitely. It would be nice to be able to vote and not having to request ID cards would be nice (though getting cards is a lot easier since we moved to Tiny Town and I can do it through our town hall). But what pushed me over the edge was doing the paperwork for Fry's passport last spring. At one point, there was a question to whether or not I had the right to sign for him on his passport since I wasn't French myself. The answer is a definite "yes" but just knowing that there could be a doubt prompted me to get the paperwork going straight away.

The next big project is that I'm kind of sort of looking for a job. Now, the thing here is that I don't have to work and I'm not taking the first thing that comes along. I've been super happy being home with Fry, in a way I never expected, but I need some grown up interaction as well. For now, I'm just flipping through the announcements on the job site and sending in my resume if I see anything interesting (so far, one thing interesting popped up, but no news on that). It would have to be something with normal working hours that I have previous experience in, and hopefully if something does come along we won't have any trouble finding some sort of care for Fry, since there aren't any day care facilities in Tiny Town. And if you're newish around here, no, I won't teach English.

So, that's been kind of exciting, but the biggest thing that's happening in the background is that we're starting to look into buying a house. Again, we're not in a super hurry, but I think Stéph's idea of waiting a bit changed when he saw Fry in an environment where he could run around a house that was child-safe, unlike ours, where we have to basically keep him in baby jail because of all the dangerous areas of our rented apartment.

I was walking by Tiny Town Realty last week with Fry and saw an announcement that looked too good to be true, so of course it was. I told Stéph about it and we went to talk to the real estate agent about it. Unfortunately it doesn't fit into what we're looking for in the end, but for a minute I could almost imagine Fry playing in the backyard. In any case, we have very specific requirements (can't be on a main road, must have a certain number of rooms, have some kind of garden or courtyard and be in Tiny Town or one of the villages surrounding it) and meet our budget, where our maxed out budget means the home is in perfect condition and ready to move in. There is one house on Tiny Town Realty's website that seems interesting and I've sent them an email about it, but other than that, they have our info and will call us if they get anything else that meets our requirements.

So, that is what is going on around here! Lots of fingers in pies around, and we'll see what we eventually pull out!