in which Vivi becomes gainfully employed (again)

So yes, I got the call yesterday, I got the job!! I was so excited, I cried (after I got off the phone, bien sûr) and shook like a leaf for half an hour. Even though this job is part time, it's with a historical foundation and my job will include working with the public - but a very different public than I saw in my last job. The best part is that the contract is a CDI - a contract of indeterminate time, aka The Golden Ticket! I am beside myself thrilled!

But then, not long after, reality came crashing down. We have one more year before Fry goes to school (remember, children are accepted in maternelle when they are three years old as long as they are potty trained) so there's the question of finding child care. The foundation is open seven days a week, and obviously we won't need care for hours when Stéphane isn't working, but will we be able to find a nounou that will take him for so few hours? We don't have a crèche (full time daycare) or a halte garderie (occassional care) in Tiny Town, and apparently the assistante maternelle lobby is so strong we probably won't be getting either one any time soon, as ridiculous as that sounds. We looked into care at Troyes, but the halte garderies have a maximum of four hours and we don't qualify for a crèche because we live so far away. We are going to contact Fry's last nounou to see if she'll be willing to help us, hoping that since she knows him already she will be more likely to say yes.

So we're trying not to let the stress get to us and celebrate the fact that finally, after six long years, I seem to have found a steady, permanent job. There's a risk I might even like my job. Now there's something I wasn't able to say six months ago!

oh, another chateau *yawn*

Last week we escaped from home improvements for an afternoon and visited a local chateau, though I must say I'm using this term quite loosely here.

The chateau of Droupt-Saint-Basle dates from the 16th century with some 18th century improvements. The last marquise died in 1974 and the chateau was slated for demolition until the current owners bought it in 1983 and restored it.





It's quite pretty, and they are quite rightfully proud of their working drawbridge and moat.



But we passed on the five euro tour, which Stéphane strongly felt would be a lecture on how they managed to restore the place. A small stroll along the road behind the chateau revealed the very important historical jungle gym and medieval swimming pool. But it was nice to get out of the house and chase Fry along a dirt road for a bit, anyway.


The church that sits in front of the chateau

home sweet home

It's amazing how much you can get done without the Internet for a distraction. One week after the move, nearly every box is empty and everything has a home. After years of living with crap piled on top of furniture or tucked under it, We finally have enough storage space. It makes a sizable difference.

The move went smoothly, even if it took a little longer than expected since we only had a huge rented van instead of a moving truck. I was so worried about Fry coming home to a completely new home, but after a moment of panic when he understood what was happening, he settled in perfectly. He has since slept better here than he ever has and the difference has been extraordinary.

We can tell the difference, too. Waking up to a tree-filled park instead of someone else's roof has been simply lovely. No neighbor's dog barking at all hours of the night, no moped-revving for ten minutes non-stop, no more people standing outside our window saying "goodnight" for half an hour at five in the morning. Everyone we've met that lives here or has ever lived here told us, "on est tranquille ici," it's really calm here, but I'm not sure we really believed it until we moved in.

It's not completely perfect. We've got some plumbing issues to sort out, when Fry has a temper tantrum you can hear it all over the building (thankfully he gets over it relatively quickly), and it's going to take a lot of work for Fry to understand that throwing stuff out the door-sized windows is *not okay*. But I think we're going to be happy here.

I got some even better news last week. I didn't mention it here but before we moved I happened across a too good to be true job opening, so I sent in my resume with an explication that we were in the middle of a move and included every single means of communication I could think of. Not only did I get a call back, the job is even cooler than the announcement stated. My interview is next Monday. I really want this job. Please think happy skippy thoughts for me for the next few days!!

21 months and a special birthday

As you are reading this, we are in the middle of moving furniture, or cleaning our old apartment, or unpacking in the new one. Today is moving day, but I couldn't let my monthly Fry posts slide.

Poor Fry is having a rough time with the move. This is the only home he's ever known and every time he wakes up from a nap something else is packed up and gone. He's been to the new apartment a few times but I'm afraid he's in for a big shock tonight when he comes home to the new place after spending the day at Mémère's house.

He is inching ever closer to talking and says "ci" for merci and "chee" for cheese, but only when prompted. I was surprised to find this week that he knows quite a few letters (thank you Old School Sesame Street!). As I wrote out the alphabet with crayons, he said quite a few of them before I did. As excited as I am about this I have to admit that I'm starting to get a bit impatient about the talking - come on kid, spit it out!

I also have to mention that today is a very special day for another reason - my very dear Grandma turns 90 today! My family all got together this weekend for a huge celebration and we're so sad we weren't able to get there this year, but we were able to talk on skype on Friday. Grandma is a real inspiration to me and I love her so much! Happy birthday Grandma!!

So we will hopefully have our internet back in less than two weeks, so you be nice while I'm gone, Internet! In the meantime, I'm sure I have some unpacking to do...

It just gets better and better

Aaaaaaah. Every time we take a carload of boxes over to the new place, I love it more and more. It has so much potential and it's going to be a pleasure to make it ours.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, everything is falling apart. I guess you could say that Reason 11 that I can't wait to leave this apartment is the electricity problems. I've never been able to run two major appliances at the same time (making laundry, already a much longer chore than it should be, even longer) and I can't even set the iron at the hottest settings because it shorts out the electricity. It has gotten progressively worse and worse upstairs until a couple of days ago the electricity started shorting out with just the washer or dryer running and when Stéphane unplugged them from the wall, the outlet was radiating heat. So, no more laundry until we've moved. We don't have an automat here in Tiny Town but there is a laundry service so if I get really desperate I may have to pay someone to wash my clothes.

Also, the Big Green Monster in our living room, a.k.a. the ancient futon couch, has finally given up the ghost. Not only is the cover all ripped up (which started right after I took it to be washed, of course) but the folding mechanism is broken and doesn't sit right on the base. It wasn't in the budget but I think we're going to take the money we were planning on using to go camping for a few days after the move and replace the couch instead. As much as it would be nice to take a mini-break after all the stress of buying and moving, I think I'd rather keep my butt off the floor and it's time for this poor old clic-clac to be put out of its misery.

Everything else seems to be going smoothly (I've just jinxed myself, haven't I?). We're taking a break from packing today to go to a horse show (hopefully photos will be taken!) and tomorrow we'll run to Troyes to buy more boxes. One more week and we're outta here!

Vivi becomes a homeowner

Well, it's done. The papers are signed, we have the keys. Last Friday, we jumped off off the seemingly never-ending rent cycle and into the world of home-ownership. It was an emotional moment for both us: for Stéphane, because his parents never owned their own home, for me because I've passed another milestone I can't share with my parents.

Of course, all this warm fuzziness quickly fizzled when we went to the apartment alone for the first time and as Stéphane attempted to open the water main, the faucet came off in his hand (worry not, it is blocked shut, which is much better than the alternative!). So we've added 'Call the Plumber' to the very long To Do list. We have two weeks before we move, and we've decided to start moving things over already, specifically on the days that we don't have anything else planned. About half of our books have made it over and are piled up in front of windows (in order to conserve boxes we're unloading as we go).

On our last trip we met our upstairs neighbor. I'm extremely happy to report that she is very kind and chatty and in five minutes spoke to us more than the majority of our neighbors in our current lane have in the last five years. She also assured us that it's calm and quiet, which is great news as our present neighbors are getting worse as time goes on.

Of course, in the middle of all this action, I have to go and catch a summer cold. I am officially in hell - it's hot again, I've got a head cold, and we have a metric ton of stuff to do and every day we're not doing sometime towards the move I feel like we're falling behind. Even so, I'm glad we managed to get away yesterday to the lake, just before my cold really bloomed, as Fry had an amazing time playing on the "beach" (the Floridian in me shudders to call it a beach but I digress) and loved playing with our friends' kids and swimming with Papa. Now I just need to find a balance between resting and packing as we have less than two weeks to blow this pop stand!

Surviving the heat

As we're on the brink of another heatwave I thought I'd write about what we do to try to stay cool. I've had quite a few comments by stunned friends and family about why we don't see air conditioning in France, as if we were some poor third world country. The simple truth that some people don't want to hear is that up until about ten years ago it only very rarely reached temperatures over 80°F in Northern France! Yes, climate change is real my friends, I am living it! Even when the temps did get over 80°, many French houses are built to withstand the heat, but not all of us are so lucky to have a heat-resistant house. So why aren't people people rushing to add a/c to their homes? Probably because it's awfully hard to run vents through concrete walls. Wooden houses are extremely rare, considered a new-fangled "green" construction method.

I'm sure I'm going to miss a few things but if you live without air conditioning and have some tips for keeping cool, please do share them in the comments!

• Shutter control. Opening the windows and shutters after the sun sets lets the cooler air in, and closing the shutters and windows when the sunlight falls directly on them help keeps the air cool inside. We have minimum success with this for two reasons: we live in a townhouse and the second floor is directly under the roof and has no insulation, and all of our windows are on the side of the house that faces due west, so we get full sun hitting our windows from 3pm until 7pm, and we have to close all of our windows, trapping in the hot air. We still do the shutter thing, it just doesn't help as much as in traditional stone houses or houses with windows on more than one side.

• Summer menu. This is the time of year to make all your favorite cold summer dishes! Pasta salads, rice salads, fresh veggies and dip, cold cuts and charcuterie, fruits and seafood, and don't forget the ice, popsicles and ice cream!
  

• Cook early. The only problem with the pasta and rice salads is that you have to turn on the stove to prepare them! This is a challenge for us and our open plan kitchen/living room. When I have a salad planned, I cook the pasta, rice, chicken, and whatever else needs doing as early as possible while it's still a bit cooler. Even with getting Fry his breakfast and settled for the morning I can manage to get things cooked by 9am. Plus this way I'm sure that it will have cooled down and ready to eat by lunch!
  

• Cook outside. Obviously this is the best way to cook in the summer but we don't have this option, unfortunately! Of course it's barbecue time so if you have the means, fire up the grill! What a great way to keep the heat out of the house!
  

• Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Do everything you can to keep the fluids going! I've gotten lazy about drinking water myself and have suffered with horrible headaches. We take extra care with Fry to offer him water at every opportunity as he often doesn't realize he's thirsty and is still too young to ask. When it's really hot, we make sure to throw drinks in the fridge, and the best tip I've gotten from a good friend was to sweeten and chill drinks with some frozen fruit!
  

• Take a shower. When you just can't stand the heat, jump in the shower for a nice break. Some say that a hot shower is the way to beat the heat, but for me, there's nothing better during a heatwave than a nice cold shower for temporary relief!
  

• Get out of the house! When the house starts trapping hot air (usually three or four days into a heatwave) it can be truly miserable at our place in the afternoons. Very often we find relief by getting out of the house and finding a shady spot outside! Whether it's a short walk by the river or a visit to the park, we very often are grateful for the fresh air and the excuse to get out of the house until the sun starts to set.
  

Unfortunately, even with all these tips, our house was still miserable last week, with the upstairs reaching temperatures of 35°C (95°F) and staying there through the night, forcing us to set up Fry's pack-n-play downstairs where it is a little cooler. The good news is that we at least have a closing date for the new apartment and should be in the new place for August! Until then, we're doing the best we can!

twenty months

Oh, my big boy is getting older! I am very happy to announce we finally have a first word (after mama and papa) and to be honest I'm surprised that it is "merci!" The truth is, I always say "thank you" when I give him something and maybe half the time follow up with a "merci," Stéphane isn't really good about saying it consistently, but given the choice "merci" is certainly easier to say! He doesn't say it every time, and it comes out more like "uh-ci," but this is common for French babies anyway.

Fry continues to be at the top of the height and weight charts and is very often as tall as or taller than boys that are six months to a year older than he is. He still loves music more than anything and will literally stop in his tracks when he hears it, and now will often dance along. Last week he went swimming for the first time (finally!!) and he totally loved it! We can't wait to do it again.

For the most part, Fry still eats everything we give him, except lettuce (a bit confused by the leaves, I think!) and is starting to turn his nose up at veggies, but we keep plugging along. Nothing makes him happier than a little bit of time with Old School Sesame Street and really starting to interact with the show.

Lest you think my sweet boy is perfect, we're definitely starting to see the beginnings of "terrible twos" with plenty of tantrums and purposefully doing things he knows are off limits. The testing will continue and we'll try to cut him off at the pass as much as we can!

an update and a recipe

So things are slowly moving along with the apartment. The papers for the loan and been sent back and we have an appointment with an electrician next Thursday evening at the apartment. It is looking very likely that we won't get the electricity done before we move in, but luckily it's not dangerous and simply needs to be updated. My MIL recently had her electricity updated (she's lived in the same apartment for 30 years!) and it was just a few days on inconvenience, so we'll hope for the same.

In the meantime, I'll be taking photos and measurements while the menfolk talk electricity. I also would have liked to have had a new kitchen before we move in, but that's not looking too good either. The good news is that I've convinced Stéphane to take a day trip to IKEA after so many excellent recommendations on their kitchens, so we'll do that one day after I have the necessary measurements in hand. We still don't have a closing date but hopefully we'll know in the next few days.

It has been insanely hot here in the Land That Air Conditioning Forgot and that's making us even more anxious to move. If we close in the next couple of weeks we may even take the opportunity to move straight away since we won't be able to get any work done before the beginning of August anyway. Last night Fry's room hit 90°F and we ended up setting up the pack-n-play downstairs, where it is a bit cooler. Of course, we'd been planing to move at the beginning of August so of course nothing's been done; I'll be starting the sorting as early as Saturday, as tomorrow is Stéphane's last day of school.

I plan on doing another post about surviving the heat very soon, but first I'd like to post this recipe for homemade Catalina salad dressing. One of the ways we keep cool is to eat plenty of pasta and rice salads and keep the cooking to a minimum and as early as possible. Catalina dressing can't be found here and while I find it too tangy for a regular salad, I love it on my taco pasta salad. Here's a recipe you can make at home that is really simple and leaves out that extra HFCS.

Homemade Catalina Dressing

1/8 cup vinegar
1/4 cup catsup
1/2 onion, chopped
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup salad oil (I use Colza)
salt & pepper to taste

Combine ingredients and blend with a hand mixer. Makes half a pint. Store in the fridge and add to your favorite salads!

10 things I won't miss about this apartment

This week we found out that we've been approved for our loan (at long last!). We still have to wait ten days before we can send off the paperwork (in case we chicken out, I guess?) and then we can schedule a closing date. We are so close!!

In honor of finally getting out of this apartment, I present you with ten things I won't miss about it at all (in no particular order):

10. The horribly creaking floorboards upstairs. It's most noticeable when I grab the dry laundry and dump it on the bed to fold, and just shifting my weight back and forth makes the floorboards creak. There's no point in finding another laundry folding spot because all of the upstairs is the same. Every time I fold the laundry I think to myself "I can't wait to move, I can't wait to move..."

9. The horrible, horrible stairs. They are narrow, steep and are comprised of planks so wide apart that Fry could easily dive through them. He is still only allowed up the stairs alone if one of us is right behind him, and downstairs if one of us is holding him (but I usually carry him down, such is my fear of these stairs). They also creak like mad. The only good thing about the stairs and floorboards upstairs is that we've never had to worry about someone sneaking in the house to kill us.

8. The shower stall. It is so small that we can't even fit a Fry-sized bucket in there for his bath, so his little tub sits in the middle of the bathroom. How much luck do you think we've had getting him to stop playing Splashy Splashy and flooding the entire bathroom?

7. The exposed brick. The entire downstairs is an open plan, meaning it's one big room that encompasses the kitchen, dining room and living room. They used to be divided with a wall, but instead of a wall we have the remains of some load bearing wooden beams, which are actually quite charming (you can see them and the terrifying stairs in this photo from a couple of months after we moved in). The problem is that they don't go all the way down to the floor. They rest on a bed of bricks, which must have been originally hidden when it was a wall. Exposed brick is exactly what you want with a child whose two speeds are Run and Sleep.

6. The kitchen. Again, thanks to the open plan, there's no hiding the kitchen and all the sharp pointy killer things in it from Fry. Until a couple of months ago, we managed to keep Fry out of the kitchen side by tearing down his play pen and using the pieces to barricade him into the living room side. But it was really ugly and a pain in the ass to have to climb over all day. We finally took it down when we decided to buy the apartment, knowing that we would be having people coming to look at the apartment. Thankfully the only time he has tried to play with the oven has been when it was off but I will be so grateful to get into our new place, where the kitchen is separated into its own room with a door that closes.

5. Fighting for parking. One of the downsides to a lane filled with maisons de ville is that they don't always have garages. Our lane is just wide enough for cars to park in the road and for regular sized cars to drive by in one direction (in the rare occasion that another car is coming in the opposite direction, one of them must find a space between parked cars and let the other pass). I think all of my neighbors have only one car (like us) so we manage happily to park in front of our homes, but it's a real PITA to come home from the grocery to find a neighbor's guest parked in front of my home, so I have to park down the street and haul in Fry and a trunkful's worth of shopping bags.

4.The Birds. Our apartment butts up against an empty warehouse, and on the other side is a stand-alone home with a yard. In this yard is a gorgeous cherry tree. Every Spring, the birds descend on the tree and then perch on our roof overhang. I don't know why they love our roof so much, but I won't miss driving around with half an inch of cherry bird shit all over the car.

3. The neighbors (speaking of...). We have lived in this apartment for five years. There are some people in this lane, that have lived here longer than us, that still will not say hello to me on sight. If I say hello to them, they grudgingly reply. We have, luckily, met some very lovely people in Tiny Town, and thanks to Stéphane's good reputation as a teacher many people know who we are (people bring Stéphane up in conversation to me in his capacity as a teacher as if I am supposed to know who they and their children are!) and in typically slow French countryside fashion, we are finally starting to feel like a part of this town. Except for my neighbors down the lane, who I will not miss, even a little. (Of course, we don't know who our new neighbors will be, but fingers are crossed!)

2. Our landlord. Oh, dear. We didn't hear a peep from her for the last five years, even in the beginning when we had problems and she didn't return our calls (Stéphane fixed any problems that came up himself). The millisecond that she understood that we were giving notice, she was on our backs. She had a "For Rent" sign nailed up before we even sent our official three months notice. The week we were out of town, she called to ask if she could show the apartment with a few hours notice. I got that message the next day when Fry and I returned, and an hour later, as I'd barely got everything out of the car and was settling down, she was there with the client on the way! I told her it would be impossible for that night and to come back the next evening, which she didn't like very much but she didn't really have a choice.* Last week we suddenly had a huge banging noise right outside our door, Stéphane went to investigate and there she was, nailing up a second "For Rent" sign. She couldn't even bother to knock on the door? The worst was Saturday at 4pm, she called and asked if she could come by with a client with two hours notice. Of course we said no. I will really be glad to see the back of her!

1. Last, but certainly not least: NO MORE RENT!! We are both so excited to be able to stop throwing money away on rent and start investing for ourselves. Even if it's not the home of our dreams, at least we're investing in our future.


*Renters have very strong rights in France: landlords are not even allowed to have an extra key and in situations like ours, they are supposed to create a visiting schedule with the renters for good hours and how much notice we are entitled to, etc. We have been very lenient with her so far, just gently but firmly refusing her when she has showed up unannounced or asked for very short notice.

Mommy & Fry's Excellent Adventure!

At last I'm sitting down to tell you about our trip last week! As I mentioned before, while Stéphane and his colleague were shepherding 50 students on a four day trip to the Vercors, Fry and I drove to the Village of the Damned, near Zurich, to visit Ms Mac.

The drive itself was fine, though it was a bit longer than anticipated with all the stops for Fry's benefit. He handled the long hours in the car much better than I expected, wardrobe malfunctions notwithstanding. When we arrived, I had the great pleasure to meet Ms Mac's handsome and clever sons and it was great to catch up with Mr Mac as well.

The next day we went to the top of Säntis mountain were we enjoyed the amazing views:







Of course I completely forgot Fry's jacket to go up a mountain where the yearly high is 8°C, so I was forced to purchase the most adorable polar fleece sweater ever, so no regrets.

The next day, we did a bit more sightseeing, the highlight of which was taking a boat from Rapperswil to Zurich on Lake Zurich. Absolutely gorgeous day, nice and cool on the water, and stimulating conversation!



You can find the rest of the photos in my flickr set here.

Despite the fact that Fry was awake at the buttcrack of dawn (much to the delight of our gracious hosts, I'm sure) we had an amazing visit and can't wait to go back!

tomates farcies

Hello hello! We had a great time on our Excellent Adventure, and I'm going to blog about that with pictures very soon, but my cousin asked me for my recipe for tomates farcies, or stuffed tomatoes. I thought for sure that I'd already posted it here but apparently I haven't at all, so I thought I'd better rectify that!

This recipe makes four generous portions, or enough for two meals for the three of us. Traditionally, this is made with ground pork, but if you're like me and have problems with cholesterol, you can substitute ground beef or go half and half (which is what I usually do). Also, I should note that all the measurements are approximates since I never measure myself!

You will need:

1 1/2 pounds of ground pork
OR
1 1/2 pounds of ground beef
OR
3/4 pounds of ground beef and 3/4 pounds of ground pork

4 large tomatoes (large enough to fit in the palm of your hand, but not too large, or else the meat won't cook in the middle)

1/3 cup bread crumbs
herbes de provence
garlic powder
salt & pepper

Slice the tops off the tomatoes, scoop out the flesh and liquid and set aside. Sprinkle a little salt into the tomato and turn upside down in your casserole dish.

Chop up the tomato flesh and toss into the casserole (makes a great sauce!).

Add to the tomato juice the meat, bread crumbs, herbes de provence, garlic powder, salt and pepper to taste and mix by hand. (if I'm using pork, I don't add salt here.)

Stuff meat mixture into the tomatoes, over-stuffing a little. Place the tops of the tomatoes back on so they are perched on top of the meat. Make meatballs with whatever meat remains and add to the casserole.

I can't tell you what temperature to set your oven because we have an easy bake oven that has no temperature gauge (yes, really) but set it to the lower side, maybe 350-ish? Let cook for about 45 minutes to an hour, or until the meat is cooked through. Serve with rice.

Bon appétit !

nineteen months

Here are some random things about Fry, who is nineteen months today:

• He would rather eat pickles than fresh cucumbers.
• He consistently waves if you ask him to say "bye-bye."
• He can feed himself with a spoon (under heavy supervision)
• He does this hilarious monster baby voice. It's hard to get him to do it, but it always cracks the three of us up, and it's really the first time Fry is aware of the "joke" and is laughing with us.
• He still generally takes two naps a day, which is totally worth getting up at 7am for. Most days, anyway.
• Still no words, but the baby talk is always evolving and he repeats sounds more often.
  
• He could stop and watch cars and trucks go by for hours, making our daily walk to the boulangerie a bit long but usually I'm not in a hurry so I don't mind.
  
• I declared a while a go that I was sure that Fry would be left handed, but I'm not so sure now. He eats pretty consistently with his right hand, but he seems to prefer to draw (well, move the crayon over the paper really fast) with his left. Only time will tell...
  

lots to celebrate

I had a great birthday last week, even if it was pretty mellow. We went to our favorite crêperie in Troyes and despite the fact that we don't take Fry out that often (or go out that often ourselves, natch), he did pretty well!


I dunno, what are you getting?

Then a short walk around Troyes before heading home, as Stéphane was working on a pretty good head cold and it was a bit too hot for Fry to be out anyway. I spent the rest of the day knitting and enjoying the sunshine. Bliss!

I took the precious little birthday money I got and bought these:



I haven't had a new pair of chucks in twenty years, it feels like coming home! They make me really happy.

This week was pretty calm. Fry has been really lovely lately, except for giving us some drama about eating his vegetables (already??) at dinner but both Stéphane and I are big believers in eating what's put before you so we're working through that, even if it means celebrating one spoonful. Fry is hilarious when it comes to new food. If he doesn't know it, he refuses it outright, and we kind of have to force it into his mouth, after which he immediately asks for more! Silly kid.

So, today is Mother's Day in France. Last year I got zilch (as my dear husband said, "you're not my mother!" pfft.) but this year I woke up to this:



and it makes me very, very happy. It's a bittersweet Mother's Day, as today is also my mother's birthday. She would have been 65. I can't believe it's been five years already!

happy bithday to me!

Yep, it's my birthday! But really, I wanted to do this big post about Fry, and then I forgot what I wanted to say, and then I just kind of lost the will to blog. This has got to stop! Also, I just need to write stuff down, this is driving me crazy!

I can show you this: last week we checked out a public forest about fifteen minutes from here and we fell in love with it! Stéphane liked it so much we wanted to go back the next day but the weather didn't cooperate. It's pretty crappy as far as forests go (this one is gorgeous but 45 minutes away) but there are nice wide paths to follow and it's great to let Fry go and let him run around and discover. Something, I'm sorry to say, he doesn't get to do much in his day-to-day life.

in which Vivi forgets that she is a second class citizen

We hit a bit of a snag at the bank last week for the loan for the apartment. Because Stéphane is a fonctionnaire (works for the government) he qualifies to be a member of a private bank with a pretty nice savings account system, so we didn't even bother going to any other banks to get quotes for our loan. The problem was that the person we talked to gave us a bunch of static about my not being French. This happens occasionally, but this is the first time it really threatened to hurt us. There are some people here that think that America is such an amazing country that they can't believe anyone would ever want to leave it, so if I'm here, that means I'm obviously running some kind of scam. She actually said to us that she didn't know if her company could approve our loan because there was the chance that we could move to America, leave our debt behind, and then not fulfill our commitment to repaying our loan.

Yes, that's right, my husband's going to leave his fonctionnaire position (which basically means he can never lose his job unless something really tragic happens) and we're going to abandon our apartment, on which we're putting a thirty percent down payment, and go back to America, where we will have no money, no jobs and very little help from the government to get on our feet. Christ some people can really talk out of their asses, can't they?

I nearly burst into tears of anger and Stéphane wasn't too pleased either, but we soon realized that this woman literally has no idea what she's talking about. Of course, we can't tell her what we really think because she's still standing between us and our loan approval (which still has to be approved by committee, but we are asking for such a small amount it's almost comical) but once it was clear that she won't personally be making any decisions about our loan and she was seriously making stuff up, we calmed down, smiled and nodded, and set an appointment for this Wednesday to finalize our loan request.

Now I'm thinking that maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to try and get my citizenship sooner than later. Not that it would affect this loan, as it takes nearly two years for citizenship to be approved, even if I had all the documents. I wish I could afford to take a quick trip to the States in order to grab all the documents we need and just be done with it. In the meantime I smile and nod and try not to let it bother me that some people do not care that I have a college education and am bilingual, I will always be just a foreigner to them.

Fry's first visit to the ER

Well, it had to happen sooner or later. Poor Fry was simply born to accident-prone parents who have their own long lists of emergency room visits. I was hoping to put off Fry's first visit for a while but he had other plans.

Tuesday was rolling along as usual until lunch time. Fry didn't take a morning nap, so when that happens he usually takes a nap after lunch instead. The only problem with that is the longer he goes without sleeping, the more likely he is to fall down and hurt himself. So we all had lunch together as usual and then Stéphane and Fry were playing while I tidied up from lunch.

And then, running around the salon, not looking where he's going as usual, he tripped on a shoe and dove directly onto a low wooden table next to the sofa. Now, Fry bangs his head often enough and has a pretty high tolerance for pain, so when he started screaming we knew it was pretty bad, but even then we didn't realize how bad at first. I scooped him up and consoled him, but it wasn't until he pulled away for a moment that I saw the blood. Fry fell directly on his ear on the edge of the table, hard enough that he nearly split his ear in two.

After the initial panic, and considering it was still lunch time (i.e. everything is still closed), I made the executive decision to throw him in the car and drive to the closest emergency room, half an hour away (in the pouring rain, why, Mother Nature, why??).

We had an hour's wait, during which I actually wondered if I'd made the right decision. His ear had positively blossomed into a veritable cauliflower ear just after the accident, but the swelling had gone down so much that by the time we actually saw a nurse I was practically apologizing for bringing him in! But it turns out that I had made the right decision, as the cut was bad enough that they were debating whether to try the glue or do stitches. They finally decided to try the glue first and go to stitches if they couldn't manage. Happily, they did manage, even though it took three of us to hold him down (!).

To tell you the truth, that's the last time he's complained about it. He was too agitated to sleep when we got home, but he slept straight through the night and yesterday was like nothing had happened at all. Except when he fell on it again at Mémère's house.

Yep, he's definitely my kid.

toddler proof

Fry turned 18 months old on Sunday. Despite the fact that he seems to be going through a major separation anxiety phase - he freaks out if someone else tries to carry him, even if I'm right next to him - he continues to amaze us everyday.

In light of the fact that we've just given our three month notice to the landlord and can expect to have visitors in the near future to see the apartment, we decided to, at long last, take down the remaining barriers, save for the one that blocks the stairs. For the last six months or so, Fry has been confined to the "salon" side of our open plan downstairs area. That means that we had to climb over the barriers in order to go to the kitchen side of the room.

So we toddler-proofed the kitchen side as well as we could and during his nap on Sunday, took the barriers down. What followed was a half hour of carnage, in which Fry found every single thing he could that could either disfigure or kill him outright, I basically screamed NO!! for thirty minutes straight, and ended with the spectacular demise of a wedding present that was just within Fry's reach.

Sunday was an emotionally charged day, to be sure.

Destroyed wedding gifts notwithstanding, the last couple of days have been better. We are forced, for his well being, to keep the downstairs as clean as a whistle, which is definitely a good thing. The cabinets are now truly toddler-proofed, the garbage can be locked closed (what amazing foresight, when I bought it four years ago!), so the remaining danger will come from the oven, which will definitely burn him if he so much as touches it. Now that the weather is warming up (supposedly - I had to turn the heat back on this morning, but that's another story!) I will use the oven sparingly over the next couple of months, happy in the knowledge that our new apartment will have a real kitchen to itself with a door that keeps small people out, even if only temporarily.

happy labor day!

This post isn't really about Labor Day, but I'm wishing those who celebrate today a nice one!

I don't think I've mentioned it, but the day after we found out that our offer had been accepted, Stéphane's computer died. Well of course it did, right? So the last couple of weeks we've been sharing mine, and if you know my husband at all, that means he completely takes it over when he's home. The new one should be ready on Wednesday, hurray!

Not that I don't have plenty to keep my occupied. I've discovered that I can, at long last, enjoy reading a book without craving a cigarette for the first time since I quit two and a half years ago. What a relief! I really missed reading.

Meanwhile, we signed the contract for the apartment last week and we have an appointment at the bank on May 12, then it's pretty much sit and wait for the notaries to do their stuff. We're told to expect at least two months but no more than three months for the paperwork to go through. Obviously we're hoping for closer to two so we can do a little work in there before we move in, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. I refuse to stress over it!

What does threaten to stress me out is our current landlord. We had to call her for some documents she completely flipped out, saying she wanted to start showing the apartment as soon as possible. Last night she stopped by with a sign to hang out in front of the apartment and we haven't even given our three month notice yet! Fortunately, there are actual laws in place for showing an apartment when there is someone still living in it: the landlord is not allowed to show it when we're not here and we can set limits. We're thinking that she must give us 24 hours notice and nothing after 7pm so as not to disrupt Fry's evening schedule. The thing I don't understand is that she owns outright at least six apartments that I know of, so I can't imagine what her financial outlook must be if she's dependent on incoming rent from every single one every month!

So that's a taste of what's happening around these parts!

homemade laundry detergent

I mentioned on twitter yesterday that I'd just finished whipping up a batch of homemade laundry detergent and a bunch of people showed interest in my recipe, so I thought I'd post it here.

Making my own laundry detergent seems so random, but it was a natural progression, in fact! We decided to use cloth diapers before Fry was even born, but you can't use regular laundry detergent with them, because the chemicals eventually break down the absorbing properties of the diapers. You can buy special chemical-free detergent at most health food stores, but they are really expensive, nearly negating the savings we were making with the cloth diapers themselves! Around the same time, I started using soap nuts for cleaning our clothes. While I really appreciated that our clothes no longer smelled like chemicals and they were indeed clean, soap nuts don't have natural bleaching properties and our clothes started to look dingy. Plus, they didn't do anything against the extremely hard water we have here.

In looking around for alternatives, I found loads of recipes for homemade detergents that are suitable for cloth diapers and for clothes. Unfortunately, if you live outside North America, you will have to have a hook-up for the Borax. If anyone knows of a source for Borax in Europe or a good substitute, please let me know! My sister brought me a box when she visited last summer, and I brought back a box as well after our visit, and we've been using it ever since. I haven't even opened the second box yet, though I think I will have to for the next batch. I based my recipe off of this one, and here is my current recipe:

Homemade Laundry Detergent



You will need:
1 bar laundry soap*
1 cup Borax
1 cup washing soda**
1/2 cup oxygen cleaning powder

*I use savon de Marseille, which has a lovely subtle scent that I quite like, but you can get unscented and even add a bit of essential oil if you like.
**Washing soda is called cristaux de soude in French

First, I mix together the Borax, washing soda and oxygen powder, since they are all powdered anyway. Then I start to grate the laundry soap and folding it into the powder as I go. I find it mixes together better than grating all the soap at once and trying to mix it together at the end.

You only need a heaping tablespoon for a load of laundry and one batch should last several months! I find this works really well, and even Fry's clothes that has suffered from... accidents (ahem) come out perfectly clean and stain-free. As you can see from the photo, I keep mine in a very large jar with the recipe taped on so it's always handy.

I hope this helps those of you that have asked; please do let me know if you try it!

OH one more thing! This is not the same recipe to use for cloth diapers! There is some concern that the laundry soap can cause build up, which can be bad for the diapers. I used the recipe that I linked above, which is equal parts Borax, washing soda and oxygen cleaning powder, and they still look brand new! We aren't using them right now (kind of a long story), but we are hanging on to them to use with the next little person that comes along.